Rough Time

It's funny how I was worried about miles then i got this long load of 1770 and can't handle it all too well. Most of the trip has been alright. However now that I am near the end of it, a lot of things have been going wrong. I guess the stipulation of losing $500 for being late was too much pressure for me.

Now I am still shutdown because I don't feel safe in the wind. So I will for sure be late.

I honestly just want to go home right now, no I'm not going to abandon my truck, but I just want to be home. I guess I am more of a homebody than I thought and it has finally hit. Anyways I guess I'll try to sleep, I have slept probably no more than 10 hrs in the last 3 days. The stress is really getting to me.

It's funny how I was worried about miles then i got this long load of 1770 and can't handle it all too well. Most of the trip has been alright. However now that I am near the end of it, a lot of things have been going wrong. I guess the stipulation of losing $500 for being late was too much pressure for me.

Now I am still shutdown because I don't feel safe in the wind. So I will for sure be late.

I honestly just want to go home right now, no I'm not going to abandon my truck, but I just want to be home. I guess I am more of a homebody than I thought and it has finally hit. Anyways I guess I'll try to sleep, I have slept probably no more than 10 hrs in the last 3 days. The stress is really getting to me.

High wind is a legitimate reason. To shut down. Just message dispatch and say "I shut down due to unsafe winds... will update when conditions change". That is CYA. If you use the word safe they have to just change the appointment time. Do you think it was counted against me for shutting down two days in WY in 2 feet of snow and ice? Nope.

Prime's policy is that no load is worth your life. If you do not message them about the weather it WILL count against you. I had a cappy day too and am considering getting a hotel room tonight lol

Devan, just like in driving school, you've hit an emotional wall. Work it out and you'll be fine.

When you start in this business, 11 hours behind the wheel can get to you. Soon, though, you'll adjust your driving, your work schedule and your mind so is won't be too bad.

Been there, done that.

What company docks you $500 for being late to an appointment?

What company docks you $500 for being late to an appointment?

Safeway

It's funny how I was worried about miles then i got this long load of 1770 and can't handle it all too well. Most of the trip has been alright. However now that I am near the end of it, a lot of things have been going wrong. I guess the stipulation of losing $500 for being late was too much pressure for me.

Now I am still shutdown because I don't feel safe in the wind. So I will for sure be late.

I honestly just want to go home right now, no I'm not going to abandon my truck, but I just want to be home. I guess I am more of a homebody than I thought and it has finally hit. Anyways I guess I'll try to sleep, I have slept probably no more than 10 hrs in the last 3 days. The stress is really getting to me.

High wind is a legitimate reason. To shut down. Just message dispatch and say "I shut down due to unsafe winds... will update when conditions change". That is CYA. If you use the word safe they have to just change the appointment time. Do you think it was counted against me for shutting down two days in WY in 2 feet of snow and ice? Nope.

Prime's policy is that no load is worth your life. If you do not message them about the weather it WILL count against you. I had a cappy day too and am considering getting a hotel room tonight lol

I did and actually went ahead and slept all night as well. The pressure was getting to me. Oh well ill be alright, just have to take on Snoqualmie pass and I'll almost be there.

Devan, just like in driving school, you've hit an emotional wall. Work it out and you'll be fine.

When you start in this business, 11 hours behind the wheel can get to you. Soon, though, you'll adjust your driving, your work schedule and your mind so is won't be too bad.

Been there, done that.

You are right Errol, it is tough, but I'll figure it out. It is easy to let our emotions get the best of us. It is even worse for me I think because this is also a great change from me being bailed out by my parents all the time, to becoming a man that has to take care of himself.

Devan Jensen

Go back and re-read through your old posts. I found an enthusiastic and positive person who is willing to help others who are fumbling through what must be a difficult transition for everyone.

It makes sense to me that there will come a time doing this work (especially starting out) that we all will start punching ourselves in the face. Seems perfectly normal to me. But the first thing you gotta do is stop swinging.

I see one person through your posts and another one now. Says to me it's a temporary thing. One of those moments that you gotta push through to get to the other side. I've always told my kids that if you have a choice between easy and hard, easy is almost always the wrong choice. The only way to grow is to get out of your comfort zone. And that sh*t can be scary and wear you down to a nub. Seems like you are coming up on your home time. Set a short term goal of getting to your home time and some rest. Put all that other stuff bouncing around in your head down. Just set it down and just take a few steps back away from it.

Your company wants you to succeed. It's in their best interest to keep you in that seat. Everyone here wants you to succeed, and you want to succeed.

So now that you have gotten some sleep, decide that you are going to have a good day and go succeed today!

FloridaBuckeye wrote to Devan:

It makes sense to me that there will come a time doing this work (especially starting out) that we all will start punching ourselves in the face. Seems perfectly normal to me. But the first thing you gotta do is stop swinging.

He is not punching himself in the face. He has hit the proverbial fork in the road, the crossroad that we all faced after a few months solo. He is doing what he must to either push through it or decide this in not for him. It will run it's course.

I see one person through your posts and another one now.

He is a truck driver now and not a student, learning to cope and adjust to the rigors of his career and new life style. Again, it's the right of passage. FloridaBuckeye, something to consider as you approach this as a career path, trucking is radically different than all but a very few jobs. It is extremely taxing in so many ways, effects different people in different ways, unforgiving and highly selective. Almost impossible to comprehend until you are living it. I don't think it's a case of making an easy or hard decision fro Devan, but a case of reality vs. tolerance. For some this job exceeds their capacity to adjust. Constantly adjusting is a daily process in trucking, it never ends. Knowing how an adjustment will affect the current situation is something learned from experience. That's the reality Devan is facing and the reality that contributes to excessively high turnover.

Devan I have followed you from the beginning, you have triumphed through many challenges leading up to this point and made a huge investment in time and effort. Your sweat equity should begin to yield positive returns. You have what it takes to be good at this...you know that. It's up to you to decide if that's what you want and if you are able look past the current low point. I say it all the time;...don't let the lows get you too low, and the highs get you too high.

Good luck.

G-Town

Honestly, I think learning from this forum about how hard this is is part of what has attracted me to it. Along with having to continuously learn in order to be successful at it. I see it as a good opportunity, and that's about the most I believe I have the right to expect from life.

I know you don't do all that you do on here, for so many, for the "Thanks". It's because it's who you are at your core.

But Thank You G-Town.

I gotta say my money is on Devon making it. :)