Mentor Problems

One night he said "80 to 94".... when he woke I was on 94 and he screamed he said 294

He'd been listening to the Qualcomm GPS lady too much: "Take ramp to 19" when you really need ramp #219!

Omg.. I'm not kiddng. On our way back to prime when I could finally get rid of this guy... we had to go through St louis. EVERY trainer I had told me the same thing "St louis is confusing I have to show you I can't just tell you so wake me". Your a freaking truck driver. .. and a trainer.. figure out St louis b4 you take the student. Smh.

So he tells me to wake him up at a certain MM... I try and he doesn't. I threw my phone at him thinking he would wake.. his dog was jumping up and down barking and h3 still didn't wake. So I get to 270 which goes to 44 which goes straight to prime..

He wakes up and starts screaming "what the f are u doing here? This is ridiculous typical female bs.. none of you listen" He went on and on. Then yelled "just get us there". I needed to take a 30 min to get there but I honestly considered violating just to get rid of him faster. I pulled into a petro 180 miles away and got on the cb... "any prime drivers going to terminal I'll give u $200 to take me". I was that desperate to get away from this guy that 3 more hours felt like hell. I stuck it out and dealt with management in the morning... A LOT of really bad stuff happened too that I won't divulge. But prime had led that situation the best way they could. I love this company.

Well if you ladies would quit wasting time on here complaining about us men, when it's obvious that we are so much better at driving, and go bake me some cookies it would be appreciated. Hahah 😜😜

Well.... I'll take the time here to apologize to the guys for being harsh. On another thread I listed some come on from men that were comical. ..

But the ONE thing I want to stress to a new female driver is that MOST men out here are good people just like the guys on this board. They will jump out of their trucks at 3am to guide you with backing. They will help you slide your tandems or break off those cable seals ...they will open and close your back doors as you get in or out of a door. They will offer to pay for lunch. Carry your bags of ice for you. I know it's not cause I'm some beauty queen...it's cause they are genuinely nice people who want to help a fellow trucker. ..especially a woman. Sometimes they just want to get out of their truck. Sometimes they are just lonely. It might be a "southern gentleman" thing cause they don't act like that back home in NJ hahaha

But don't forget... Ted Bundy was a "nice guy" and a lawyer before he killed 50 women and was sentenced to death. Be cordial but be aware. And stay safe

I wanted to update you guys. I got a ride to my home terminal and will stay here until Monday morning where I have a meeting with safety. I'm pretty sure they will simply extend my mentor training and additional week with a new mentor. I'll update once I find out. :)

Well I'm gonna help you understand what safety is looking for and this could mean the difference between going back out with a trainer or being issued a bus ticket home without a job. In fact, that's pretty much what you're getting ready to do is go through an interview to see if they want to keep you around or not. What you say will determine your fate. Your trainer already kicked you off his truck right away and has obviously told the company he thinks you have no business being behind the wheel. Safety wants to hear your side of it and I'm gonna help you understand what they would think of what you've told us so far and what they're looking for in this interview.

Here are a few key points:

• Safety is of course the most important thing out there on the road and all top tier drivers take safety very, very seriously.
• Taking personal responsibility for everything that happens when you're behind the wheel of that truck is another trait that all top tier drivers share.
• Top tier drivers don't make excuses or place blame on others if they screw up.

Keep those points in mind.

What they want to see is if you have the right attitude and the nerve it takes for doing this job. If you go in there blaming your trainer for the incident you're going home on a bus immediately. The reason for that is you simply can't have built in excuses for poor performance. You can't just run into something and think it's ok because something wasn't the way you wanted it to be. You're going to be driving when you're tired, when you're in heavy traffic, in bad weather, on tight schedules, on narrow roads, over mountain passes, and much of it will be at night when it's difficult to see. It takes a lot of nerve, a lot of concentration, and a constant awareness of everything that's going on around you.

You also have to be the captain of that ship. For instance, you mentioned your trainer was blocking your mirror. If that was the case then you should have asked him to please sit back so you can see the mirror. You can't just blindly go for it and see what happens. You're going to be in circumstances all the time where you simply have to wait for someone to move or you're going to have to get out and move something out of your way in order to safely navigate through. You obviously can't just run into things and say they're in your way or blame a poorly adjusted mirror or anything of the sort. It's up to you to figure out how to make it through any and all circumstances safely. Personal responsibility.

Now I'm going to tell you how safety will interpret the things you've said to us so you won't make the mistake of repeating them. Like I said, this stuff will cost you your job.

It's just really hard for me to blindly follow directions like that especially when he was being a jerkface the entire time.

Someone was giving you turn by turn directions and you thought that made it difficult? You had a personal navigational assistant for God's sake. It doesn't get any better than that. You're certainly not going to have that once you go solo. It's going to be on you to figure everything out alone. Safety is going to think, "If she thinks that's hard she has no chance of navigating circumstances that are actually hard."

And the fact that he was being a jerkface is no excuse either. You're going to be backing into tight docks off the street while people are yelling at you, giving you the finger, honking their horns, and trying to get around you only inches from your bumper. I've had to block the New Jersey turnpike before to help a truck get out of the way after a mechanical failure. I've had the police block off all of the streets around City Hall in downtown Phoenix at 6:00 p.m. on a Friday so I could go the wrong way on one way streets to get backed in under City Hall while thousands of people waited quite impatiently. You have to be able to block it all out and focus on the task at hand. Safety is going to see this as being too easily distracted.

I was exhausted at the end of my day and it was a dark area. However my mentor should not have put me in that position

Again, you're blaming others for your mistakes but now here's a new one - you shouldn't have been in what position? It's dark out and you're tired? That's going to be almost every single day of your life out there as a driver. Those are just normal circumstances.

I'm female and I like to know where I'm going....

If you "play the female card" you're going home on a bus immediately. Being a female in a male dominated industry means you have to be that much tougher than most females. It's not an excuse to ask for special treatment. It's an extra challenge you have to overcome. Do not play the female card.

He even told me to keep going after the tires were sitting on the curb. Had I been given time to evaluate the situation, instead of blindly trudging on, I'm sure I could've found a way to not bend the rim as it passed over the edge of the curb!

You bent the rim getting up onto the curb, not coming off it. It was too late by then. You have to avoid hitting it in the first place.

I'll give you the strategy for the interview next...

Now here's the strategy for this interview.

First of all, you're extremely upset that you made a mistake and bent that rim. It's a painful mistake and you wish you could do it over again. You're certain you would get it right the next time and you've definitely learned some important lessons.

"What lessons?" the safety manager asks.

• I have to keep calm under difficult circumstances
• I have to take my time and go slow enough to make certain I'm not going to bump into anything at any time
• I have to get out and look if I'm not 100% certain I'm clear of everything, and sometimes G.O.A.L. even if I am certain
• I have to take control of a situation and make sure I can see everything, I can hear everything, I'm where I need to be, and everything is clear of my path

You tell them you take safety as seriously as a heart attack and you can't believe that it happened. You wanted to do everything perfectly and you know you can do better, and you will.

You're also disappointed that you let yourself get upset by the disagreements you had with your trainer. You were a little thrown off by the way he was doing things, you were disappointed that you made a mistake, and you let it distract you and upset you. You know now that you should have just kept your cool and communicated with him in a calm and professional way. You know that it doesn't matter how someone acts toward you. What matters is how you respond and you didn't respond well. It's a lesson learned.

I'm pretty sure I'm getting a new trainer, it's just a matter of when. I'm not about to quit after all the crap I've gone through to get this far.

You haven't gone through anything yet. Don't give them the impression that any of this has felt daunting or overwhelming. You've gone through schooling, which was the easiest part, and now you're in training with a proven professional guiding you along which is the second easiest part. You haven't even gotten to the really hard part yet where you're all alone trying to figure everything out for yourself. And this is the middle of summer. You're not dealing with snowstorms and icy roads and slick mountain passes yet. So don't let on that you think this has been that difficult. Make it seem like you made a simple and dumb mistake in circumstances you're more than capable of handling and then you let your emotions get the better of you instead of communicating calmly and professionally.

If you take my advice you have an excellent chance of keeping your job. Take 100% of the blame onto your own shoulders for not only the bent rim but the disagreement with your trainer. Let them know you desperately want to be great at this, you're excited about this opportunity, you're disappointed you made a mistake, and you're super eager to get out there and show them you have what it takes to be great at this.

If you blame anyone else for anything or complain that any of this has been too difficult or play the female card you're going home on a bus without a job.

The ball is in your court. They want to hear what you have to say about the incident, about the disagreement, and how you intend to move forward from here. Say the right things even if you don't believe them because if you stick with this long enough to become a top tier driver someday you'll realize that everything I'm telling you to think and say is actually true. You just may not realize it yet.

Maybe that trainer really is a chauvinist pig but to be honest nobody really cares about that right now. He's not the one on trial at the moment, you are. They'll deal with him one way or another. But all that matters at the moment is that you keep your job. Again, you're a female in a male dominated industry and there are pigs out there that you're going to have to deal with at times if you want to be a trucker. No one is looking to baby you because you're a female. They're looking for females that are tough enough to handle the job. You're trying to prove to them that you're going to be a tough, safe, hard working, top tier professional that can overcome any and all obstacles to get the job done safely and reliably out there. You're not the type to make excuses and you're not going to settle for anything less than being the best out there. You're ready to get back out there and do better.

That's what they need to hear from you.

Kelsi, I give two thumbs up to Brett's advice here, in fact if I had five thumbs, I'd give it a five thumbs up.

It probably does not jibe with the way you're feeling, but it is important that you understand it, and act accordingly.

I wanted to respond to this the other day, but I am swamped right now. He covered it all, and gave you some great advice. I suffered through a terrible trainer, so I understand your frustration. My experience turned out in the end to prove that the company knew exactly how tough it was being trained by the bozo that I was with, but they felt like if you could survive him, then you could survive trucking.

Guess what? They were right!

Coming from someone who has had the meeting with safety, I have to doubly agree with Brett on this. The most important thing is to take responsibility for the mistakes. And show them that you care about being a successful driver and that you learned something. And most importantly don't hit anything else. Hopefully it will all work for you and you will turn out to be a successful driver.

. I'm not about to quit after all the crap I've gone through to get this far.

Then all the button pushing in the world shouldn't matter. Not everyone should be a trainer.A couple of days ago I was taking my 30 when a truck pulls up and a guy hops out and watches "what I later figured out was his trainee" back into the spot next to me. No helping words of wisdom from this a$$hat or anything other than yelling stop. Finally the trainee gets it in the a few minutes later the trainer gets into the truck and yells some more and hops out and heads into the truckstop.... So I rolled my window down and talked to him alittle and told him a really easy way he could have lined up for that particular spot. And let him know that once he's off that guys truck there's no such thing as cheating when it comes to backing.

I agree with Brett and the others on this. THAT'S why i was so harsh in my earlier post when i ft you weren't accepting your responsibility in curbing that rim.

I truly wish you the best. Just remember PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY as your mantra and you'll be ok.