Starting To Wonder

Thanks for the suggestions everyone. Brett what you say is true about being stressed about everything else that it is hard to enjoy things at times. And Errol and Rick I definitely hit a rut/plateau again. The hard thing is this is all I have right now, I failed out of college and the only decent job I can find home is being a correctional officer. Sure there is "trades", but they don't apprentice they only take experienced people and the trucking jobs are all family based.

I'm at a weird point right now because I want to live a little more like a normal person, but I don't want to pay for anything (apartment, vehicle, etc). I am in it for a year regardless. Just feels good to get input from everyone.

Thanks for the suggestions everyone. Brett what you say is true about being stressed about everything else that it is hard to enjoy things at times. And Errol and Rick I definitely hit a rut/plateau again. The hard thing is this is all I have right now, I failed out of college and the only decent job I can find home is being a correctional officer. Sure there is "trades", but they don't apprentice they only take experienced people and the trucking jobs are all family based.

I'm at a weird point right now because I want to live a little more like a normal person, but I don't want to pay for anything (apartment, vehicle, etc). I am in it for a year regardless. Just feels good to get input from everyone.

Heck man do what Brett said, try to go see a game, or what I said, or try something new. I am the type of person that prefers to be alone, I dont mind doing things by myself at all. As long as you are the same you can have some fun on the road.

Do you Game at all? Geocache?

Devan I hear you loud and clear. I've been struggling really hard with the exact same thing myself. It's causing some serious depression which is tough to get over. I've been looking around for local jobs near me, but unfortunately, the only thing around me is logging or Missouri DOT , neither of which I can get into.

So instead I've been thinking about changing what I'm doing. Looking perhaps into a company that can get us home a little more often or maybe even making a switch into flatbed for the weekly hometime. I have a couple of very interesting job offers on the table that I'm considering.

What's holding me back? Honestly, my dispatcher. I had submitted an application to a company that's 2 hours from home on a whim. They require a year minimum experience. I never expected to hear back from them but apparently they contacted TransAm asking about me. My dispatcher called me frantic, asking if I was leaving him! He doesn't want me to leave. He's asked several times if there's anything he can do. More miles, anything. He's told me I'm one of the best drivers on his board. I don't want to leave him. Truly. But this company called me today.

So I'm stuck now in this debate. And struggling hard.

So I get it. And don't let it get you down. It's a mountain and you just have to finish the climb to the top then ride the jakes all the way down...

Rick, are you suggesting gladhand get a hooked for the night to make life on the road easier?

Here's what I do when feeling like this... I run my load as fast as I can then find an attraction along the way... A casino...the corvette museum... Even a restaurant others brag about. Stop and go to the movies or walk around a mall.

Not only does it get you out of the truck but it helps you to break up your day and "live" life.

This week for me was terrible... Storms all through the Midwest just drained me. When my reefer kept shutting don't every two hours I told my FM I was bringing it into the terminal and taking a 34. Went to dinner with some other drivers...saw a movie.... Checked out a car show.

Oh.. And got a massage at the spa and rented a suite for a couple nights.

I feel recharged. Good luck and hang in there.

Won't deny that I googled the nearest greyhound station after the qualcom gps took me down a dead end street and said "you have reached your destination", which it wasn't. 2am trying to figure out how to turn around without taking out any fences and a partner I couldn't get out of the sleeper berth even if it were on fire I was ready to head to the house and reconsider my options.

I do love driving though. And I've got a six month commitment to fulfill. Instead of walking the 1.5 miles to greyhound and booking a ticket I just put in for some home time. But it was a pretty harsh moment feeling completely left on my own to figure every thing out. Took some of my zeal away.

Now I just accept that I'm the only one I can count on to have my back.

I'm still fairly new to truck driving and get to go home at the end of the day 99% of the time. You can bet sometimes even I think.....maybe I'm not cut out for this or, this is too stressful...then I think about the good days I have on the job...and the money. And what jobs I used to do, how much I loathed going to those jobs. Working my butt off for crappy pay. At least now I work my butt off for good pay! I just gotta keep pushin' on. One day I'll be forced to quit this job so I might as well enjoy it while I can.

Hang in there man...give it some time. Of course fulfill your contract. In the meantime try to make the most out of where ever your loads take you it might give you that thing you feel your missing. And...really....I would think that if the only thing your really missing about "home" is the luxuries and a 40hr work week...once your done with your contract you could change where "home" is where you can get on a home base type CDL job? I imagine the pay won't be as good and it would be more monotonous but, you'd be home more. I think if I were in your shoes...I'd fulfill the contract, and then give it a few more months since by then you won't be obligated to keep driving, see how you feel then about it.

Seems like you are being restricted in your driving career by where you live. You might want to consider a new place to call home. That's one of my goals if I stay in the industry for a while. Currently I live near Atlanta, GA, and there is NO WAY I'd take a local CDL A job here. I hate driving in this town.

So, after I get my finances under control and get my current house sold, I'll be looking for a bit of land somewhere in a state with low taxes that lets me:

Build a micro-house. Not a trailer.

Park a truck on my land.

Get decent internet.

Go to at least a few different restaurants.

See a movie a few times a year.

Access the interstate easily.

I've seen a bunch of towns along I-40, I-70, and I-80 that would fit the bill.

You got some really awesome responses here.

Something else I was just thinking about. Your "home" is with your parents, right? I don't remember. But if you are, part of what you may be going through is just normal for living away from home. I moved out pretty early to go to college and haven't lived there since, other than for a few months a couple years ago. But it took me years to fully adjust. I think most people probably adjust faster than I did--I was just a spoiled brat haha. And six years later, I still miss home with mom and dad from time to time.

Throw the trucking lifestyle in the mix with that and you've got yourself a pretty huge lifestyle change.

If at all possible, try to ease the transition by looking into dedicated there at Swift. If you can manage to get on a dedicated fleet, many of the frustrations you've been having will probably disappear overnight.

Give yourself a break. You're doing very well. Just try to hang in there for at least that first year so you don't look back on this and regret quitting prematurely.

Replies have been very helpful.