Depressed...lol

Down here in leesburg, FL. Picking up a load about 11 miles out of town. Arrive at the shipper , forgot to pre-cool my reefer. Has to be 33 degrees. No problem I say, I'm 30 minutes early, shouldn't take long. Guard says that I can't pre-cool on the property, and I have to leave. Tells me there is a publix just down the road. Not a problem, I have time.

Arrive at publix, call store to make sure I can sit there and that I want to buy a few things, no problem she says.

Get out of the truck, reefer is already at 38 degrees, mind you this is just about 8 minutes after I left the shipper...whatever, need to shop anyway.

Thus publix is in a small strip mall that is in front of what looks like a well to do housing community. "Cool", I think, "I'll get to shop at a nice place.

I get inside and I see people, people who look like they have money, and no cares in the world. You know the type, stroll in on a lazy Saturday morning, wearing their Polo shirts and plaid shorts, white socks pulled up capped with sandals or white sneakers. The standard look for well to do retired people.

As I roamed the store, I chuckled to myself at the absurdity of what I was experiencing. I'm in a store that is basically there to serve the needs of the community of people that live right behind it. "Must be nice", I thought, as roamed around in my old worn sneakers, t shirt and old blue jeans. I'm cordial with everyone. Do not misunderstand, I wasn't hating, just felt the amusement of how life must be like for these people who have made it in their lives. I must admit, I felt a bit out of place, as if I could sense the disapprove of those who were near me. Mind you, nobody was actually looking at me, and nobody probably paid any attention to me. It was just a self imposed sense of feeling like I don't belong in this place.

As I gathered my items, I started to head toward the checkout. My feeling of cynicism gradually turned to sadness and a bit of regret as I came to the realization that this would probably never be my life. Though I work hard, I just don't feel that I will ever find myself in the position of comfort, as the people around me experience on a daily basis. Bad lot in life? Maybe lack of opportunity? Or just bad choices made along my path? Perhaps a mix of all of that.

As I stroll out into the parking lot, headed back to my truck, I spot what looks like someone's personal golf cart that someone drove there to do their shopping guide in. It was a nice golf cart, Yamaha brand. As I walk by, I notice two names written on either side of the cart, the owners. Patty and David.

As I sit here in my truck once again waiting on my load to the north, I just have to say, congratulations David and patty..you have made it. Live life and live it well for those of us who may never experience a life of comfort, I salute you.....

When you realize that you don't need those things to be comfortable you will be so much more at peace with yourself.

You echo my thoughts, sort of...

I have worked most of my life. I don't know what I would do if I wasn't working. I was on unemployment for a couple months and it drive me crazy. The life of luxury really holds no attraction for me. My retirement will be a tiny home on a small farm where I can raise alpacas and chickens.

As I drive through those areas I feel a little sorry for those people. They will never know the satisfaction of coming down off Cabbage with 41000 in the box knowing they never even had to touch the service brakes. They won't top out a hill in the middle of nowhere in Idaho and see a beautiful panorama laid out for them. They will miss the beauty that thus country has to offer.

As they sit in their luxurious home and plan their next party with Biff and Muffy, which will be just like every other party they have had in the past few decades, they will never know what a variety of things this country has to offer. I feel sorry for them for that.

I'm 42 no kids. I wanted to wait to have kids until I did everything I wanted to do. So I made a list...travel the world, swim with dolphins, write a book, parasail, bungee jump etc.

One of those things was drive a big rig hahaha. Now I've done everything I ever wanted including playing with a tiger and manning a dog sled. And not only am i too old to have kids now but i dont want them. Not sure what life holds.for me...but when I died I'll feel complete. N I did it without following other ppls plans for me.

Make a list of what u want in life and make it happen.

Down here in leesburg, FL. Picking up a load about 11 miles out of town. Arrive at the shipper , forgot to pre-cool my reefer. Has to be 33 degrees. No problem I say, I'm 30 minutes early, shouldn't take long. Guard says that I can't pre-cool on the property, and I have to leave. Tells me there is a publix just down the road. Not a problem, I have time.

Arrive at publix, call store to make sure I can sit there and that I want to buy a few things, no problem she says.

Get out of the truck, reefer is already at 38 degrees, mind you this is just about 8 minutes after I left the shipper...whatever, need to shop anyway.

Thus publix is in a small strip mall that is in front of what looks like a well to do housing community. "Cool", I think, "I'll get to shop at a nice place.

I get inside and I see people, people who look like they have money, and no cares in the world. You know the type, stroll in on a lazy Saturday morning, wearing their Polo shirts and plaid shorts, white socks pulled up capped with sandals or white sneakers. The standard look for well to do retired people.

As I roamed the store, I chuckled to myself at the absurdity of what I was experiencing. I'm in a store that is basically there to serve the needs of the community of people that live right behind it. "Must be nice", I thought, as roamed around in my old worn sneakers, t shirt and old blue jeans. I'm cordial with everyone. Do not misunderstand, I wasn't hating, just felt the amusement of how life must be like for these people who have made it in their lives. I must admit, I felt a bit out of place, as if I could sense the disapprove of those who were near me. Mind you, nobody was actually looking at me, and nobody probably paid any attention to me. It was just a self imposed sense of feeling like I don't belong in this place.

As I gathered my items, I started to head toward the checkout. My feeling of cynicism gradually turned to sadness and a bit of regret as I came to the realization that this would probably never be my life. Though I work hard, I just don't feel that I will ever find myself in the position of comfort, as the people around me experience on a daily basis. Bad lot in life? Maybe lack of opportunity? Or just bad choices made along my path? Perhaps a mix of all of that.

As I stroll out into the parking lot, headed back to my truck, I spot what looks like someone's personal golf cart that someone drove there to do their shopping guide in. It was a nice golf cart, Yamaha brand. As I walk by, I notice two names written on either side of the cart, the owners. Patty and David.

As I sit here in my truck once again waiting on my load to the north, I just have to say, congratulations David and patty..you have made it. Live life and live it well for those of us who may never experience a life of comfort, I salute you.....

Drive for awhile then apply at Publix. Great place to work!!

You had me until alpacas. My neighbor has several hundred of them. He's a jerk. Therefore, alpacas must be bad. My point is, perspective is everything. I don't know about Biff and Muffy but what if David and Patty are genuine people? Have you ever seen some old codger at the market and wonder why he's moving so slow? I used to. Then I realized that maybe he was slow because he was carrying shrapnel from an enemy shell. I was watching the History Channel on TV and saw an old man that looked like any old man at the store. He was a certified hero from WWII. It made me understand that I can't know another person's story just by looking at them. I share your feelings about Cabbage Hill without using the brakes, I did it too. That's pretty awesome. But maybe Dave or Patty have done some cool stuff too.

Anyone else with a bucket list? Yours was pretty scary Rainey. When I was younger I planned retirement as driving a camper around the country, now I can do it getting paid. But my first priority is paying any bills that are hanging over my head. That's a freedom I haven't felt in a while. I'm sure Biff and Muffy worked hard for what they have. I know truck drivings' going to give me that chance.

My ex-in-laws live that kind of life and I just know it's not for me. Working a small farm just appeals to me. Something to do every day, not too hard, just keeping busy being productive.

And Rob, alpacas are very gentle animals. They don't bite or spit. They hum, a very relaxing sound. They all poop in the same place, so no messy shoes and easily collected compost for the garden. Chickens, well, they lay eggs...

Change your paradigm. (i.e...if you think you can't, you're right. If you think you can, you're right.) What we achieve in our lives is in direct relation to what we believe we will achieve.

The clearer we define things in our own mind, the sooner they actually become reality. Write it down, talk about it. Whatever helps you define what you really want in your thoughts. Picture it and fill in the details.

Sambo you can be comfortable, it's not how much you make. It's what you do with it. Live below your means, don't have a car payment. Instead invest that car payment and retire a millionaire! It's possible. Check out Dave Ramsey podcast, I listen to him as well as others as I drive every day.