Bad Experience Or Am I The Problem?

I recently completed trucking school and got off to a slow start in trucking due to a close family member having covid 19. I get started with one company and it turns to complete disaster because I have a very insecure trainer. It became very clear during our training that my trainer did not like me period. No matter what I did it was wrong. He made accusations that I almost hit a ditch and almost hit another vehicle head on. I was told that you don't check your mirrors and your turns are bad. My confidence became so shaken I missed a turn and the trainer started taking his hand and putting it to his head like I should use my brain. When the other students drove they made mistakes and the trainer said nothing. Once the training for the day was over I spoke to the company and they did an investigation. They had a camera and saw that the mistakes he claimed were false. The one about me almost hitting a vehicle head on was the main one. He told me to turn my left blinker on and prepare to turn left on the highway, which I did. At that point, a car was headed straight for the truck and my trainer freaked out not realizing that the vehicle had a yield sign for traffic turning left to merge on the highway. The trainer even pulled me in the office when we got back with his manager to lecture me on how he could have pulled the brakes on me then and failed me as a dangerous driver and the manager backed him without looking at anything. As stated before they finally did investigate once I called their corporate offices. I called because of the way they treated me in the office knowing I really didn't do anything wrong. Well sure I clearly wasn't an experienced driver but not what all he claimed. The company pulled the other students in and they admitted that they made mistakes and nothing was said but they felt the trainer was really going after me for some reason. The students backed me up on the ditch that I never almost hit because they both looked at the mirrors on the hood and told them I never came close. Basically I spoke to the students later and they told me that they felt compelled to tell the truth even though they still needed their training and did not really want to rock the boat for themselves. I thanked them for their honesty. The company also saw the camera facing out that I was never going to hit the car because they had to yield to us. The company wanted me to come back and finish my training and still be trained by the same guy. They said they spoke to him and all should be better. They also claimed because of the account I would be working he was the best option for my training. I flat out just did not feel comfortable anymore and declined. I thanked them for the opportunity and felt it best that I try another company. Corporate informed me that if I ever want to come back that I was welcome. The thing is I would still have to deal with the trainer and the manager and I can't shake the way they behaved in the office. I tried a new company and man it started out great. I was so very excited like the first company until I got on the truck with my trainer. I was warned by the operations manager that the trainer talks a lot and can be over bearing but they felt he was a good trainer. I want to point out that I'm a very introverted person. The first day or two things seemed ok feeling each other out. It became clear sleeping would be an issue because he snored louder than anyone I've ever heard and he admitted he had a medical issue. I tried plugs but it did not work. I did all he asked on training and asked him a ton of questions being new. I did all I could to deal with his snoring but I got limited sleep. I even got up and walked around a rest area one morning trying to figure out how I was going to tell him I needed another trainer. He ended up calling another trainer a friend of his. The company was ok with me training with the other trainer. I sincerely thanked the first trainer more than once for all he did for me but I could sense something was still wrong. I started training with the second trainer and he let me know that the 1st trainer informed him that he didn't know what to think of me. He felt that I'm too serious as a person and he didn't like me very much. I explained to the 2nd trainer that yes I'm aware of my personality that I'm very introverted but I will do all he tells me to just like the 1st trainer and will loosen up some which I did. We were having a good time for a couple of days feeling things out and then things started to change. I could see the trainer was very controlling of his family which is his business. Cameras all over his property and his house. If someone left clothes on the floor a door to a room open or was eating at a time he didn't like he would call them and call them mother ######'# and tell them what they should be doing. He even contacted his daughters boyfriend telling her sending word to him he may kick his a## when he gets home because he broke up with her. He then started asking me why I ate some of the food I would buy ate the truck stops. Not for nutrition info just the fact he didn't like the food of my choice and I should try some of what he eats. I declined respectfully. I take certain meds and he would literally not only ask what kind I took but demand I tell him. If I was on my phone and not being trained he would literally demand that I tell him what I was doing on my phone.

What is your question again? I lost track after reading that novel.

Good grief! Is there a full moon out? Two, beyond strange posts! I just got up...I need some coffee I guess to make sense of these guys.

Laura

Could be a little of both. Sounds like you handled the problem at the first school well. Idk for sure. I wasn't there.

The loud snoring trainer points to the trainer as the problem. However, many people can sleep through that. So that is partially a problem with you too. Not saying you're wrong bc you can't sleep through snoring. It just is what it is. I'm a very light sleeper. I find it difficult to fall asleep if I can hear another person breathing. I managed to struggle through training though. Eventually you hit a point where exhaustion takes over and you will sleep. Believe me, I know it sucks.

Being an introvert with a trainer who likes to talk is more of a personality conflict. Can't really blame anyone in that situation. Just remember that as long as the trainer is teaching you and not doing anything dangerous, the burden is on you to try and make it work. In the grand scheme of things you only have to put up with it for a very short amount of time. I'm not taking sides, I'm just telling you what the general consensus will be. You are the trainee. It's up to you to get over any hurdles you encounter during training, whether it seems fair or not🤷.

That last trainer sounds like an A-hole. In my humble opinion I'd say he is definitely the problem. My roommate in CDL school was a scumbag. He'd talk to his wife every evening on the phone-on speaker phone no less. He'd call her a dumb -itch and constantly say he wanted slap her if she asked a question he thought was stupid. Luckily he got sent home after 3 days. I would not want to be in a truck with someone like that. I'd be enraged constantly.

The rest of the story. One night in the sleeper birth I fell asleep and my wife sent me a text and I felt the vibration on my hip and woke up and started texting her back. The trainer saw me texting and said I thought you were asleep and I said I was. He stated don’t lie to me. I explained to him I was not lying that I felt the vibration after nodding off. I was like really? Then one night after driving all day I decided I was not going to eat dinner and go straight to bed. We discussed this the next day and I told him I wasn’t hungry just very tired and he said abruptly don’t fuc### lie to me you were upset about something. I explained I wasn’t and he wouldn’t have it. ? After this we ran into my 1st trainer in Arizona at a truck stop and I spoke to him and showed him respect and he started treating me badly. Speaking to me with aggression and starring in my eyes. I was like what the hell? He let me know that he ran into another former employee that I worked with at another business that I worked for years. The former co worker left that business and now works where we pick up our trailers. He asked them if they knew me and she told him yes that I was a very hard worker that I was all over the place that I worked from the moment I stepped foot on property till I went home for years. He then became very angry and said your problem is you have a memory problem that’s what the hell your problem is. He then bragged how he almost started a fight at a truck stop when he was training me which was true between 2 other truckers. I spoke up and said well you sure do like to start trouble. I was trying to politely tell him to knock off his aggressive attitude. He bowed his shoulders and said I back it up too starring with aggression looking dead at me. He clearly didn’t get the hint. The 2nd trainer and I left and of course I did not like the way the 1st trainer spoke to me but I didn’t say anything. The second trainer knew I wasn’t happy with the 1st trainers attitude and questioned me on it. He explained to me that he was probably playing with me. I explained that well I’m a student and he’s a trainer for the company and he seemed very inappropriate to me. I explained that it was clear that he did not like me and that was ok but he clearly seems to be very immature. Yes I was vocal. The 2nd trainer got upset and started to lecture me that I should learn to take stuff like this off of people. This same guy lecturing me would do the same things at truck stops, the compay, the consignee’s and yes at the shipper. He would get ****ed at others and lecture me. ? At that point the 2nd trainer would train me on the computer and laugh at me when I wouldn’t know things because I was new. He would laugh and when not laughing blink his eyes and act condescending. I would say nothing and keep training. This happened more than once. Finally we got to a consignee and he was doing it again and I said nothing. I then elected to throw our garbage away and knew he had been on their property before. I didn’t see the garbage because it was blocked by a fence and you couldn’t see it. I asked him where it was because I knew he had been there before. He started laughing at me again and I said why are you doing that? He was like what? I said why do you keep laughing at me. You do it when we are training and not just the computer. I’d already asked other questions about trucking and he would do it then. Things I would not know being new. After the issue with his friend the 1st trainer and me questioning him on his laughing at me we barely spoke for a day in a half. Prior to all this, he said I was doing very well. Once the issue with the 1st trainer happened and me questioning him on laughing at me which was even during casual conversations he let me know that I probably would not make it in trucking. I would probably quit because I can’t let things go. Again his lecture is things he does himself. On the way back for our next load I see a place my wife would like so I call her when I’m not being trained later that day. He listened and later lectured me on what I told my wife on the phone. It was a simple conversation about jewelry she liked. He literally lectured me telling me that my wife and I should appreciate the jewelry and how it’s made by the company that makes it. He stated you both should know this information like something was wrong with us. I explained that this was a conversation between my wife and I and said no matter you both should know this information. After this I’m texting my son not training and he wants to know if I’m complaining to my wife about him. I told him no that my son suffered an eye injury and I was checking on him. He said, don’t fuc### lie to me. I’m like what? When we get back I get my stuff out of the truck and go home. I call the company and tell them what all I’m telling you. There only solution is putting me with another trainer. I tried telling them all on here and it’s yes I hear you right, right um we will get you another trainer. They don’t want to hear it. ? I not sure now what to do? I need a job. I’ve soul searched this and know I’m introverted and not the way these two gentlemen want me to be but all I need is training. The thing is we are different people I guess? My thing is trainers should try to lift you up not belittle. Trainers should not act aggressive either. Are my expectations too high? I’m at a loss. Sorry for the novel. Thanks

Unfortunately I think a lot of companies have to take whoever they can get to train people. Some do it for the money, the extra help, or because it makes them feel important, but not everyone is good at it. It does sound like you had some bad luck, but it may have something to do with your personality as well. It could be that you're not hiding your feelings as well as you think you are or something like that.

In any case, good luck with the next trainer. If he yells at you, makes you feel stupid, or lectures you on things that he overhears, try not to take it personally.

Paragraphs are your friend.

Ok..new forum rule

No more Red Bull before posting

😉

Thanks for the encouragement. Sorry for the novel. I don't drink Red Bull but heck maybe I should try it. Paragraphs probably should have been the way to go.

I know I’m new to all this - but.... I thought the same thing!

Good grief! Is there a full moon out? Two, beyond strange posts! I just got up...I need some coffee I guess to make sense of these guys.

Laura