Memoirs Of CDL Training Add A Lil OTR

In reference to last post I believe he planned the run like this. Our return load was back to the yard via I-40 but we took I-20 so we could eat soul food at a Buffet in 'ssippi, then ice cream near Atlanta. Cooke paid by the run not mile. So when he went around his elbow to get to his $!; the trip wad extended 4 days.

How long ago was it that this was taking place?

I drive from April 2005-August 2006 .

I have recently been consulting on" bar rescue project" of sorts. Which sent me reeling back into the chefs nite life. Basically resulting in a broken hand because a drunk idiot kept putting his hands on me. I cant prepare the menu so the bar owner is firing me I suppose. If he gets his mouth off the bottle and nose off the mirror long enough to realize whats going on. I made some mistakes in 2020 that are keeping me from re-training to drive. I am getting a few responses from companies I have reached out to about working as a dispatcher. So I am researching possibility of starting my own freight dispatching business w a few twists. I figured jumping back into the food biz for a short period of time would keep money in my pocket. What I have seen in the past week makes the "lot lizard" infested truck stops(Pilot on 30 in Dallas comes to mind) look like midnite mass on xmas eve. It crushes me to see the restaurant business like this. Rampant drug use, stealing, employees showing up when they want to, drunk on the job etc. If you want to flush it out boom there goes your entire staff. Doors close. Although I am sure there are many drivers that may use/abuse drugs but its not in your face every minute of the day. I have a wild past, however when I drove I was 100% drug free. I cant even fathom the thought of getting stoned or hopped up on "high speed chicken feed" jumping behind the wheel of a vehicle with trailer grossing 80,000lb. I remember a white dodge caravan passing us w the kids in back doing the air horn motion. Two hrs later traffic at a stand still. Drivers close to tears on the cb. We get to the crash, big truck on its side in median, a white caravan a few 100 yards away mangled. Blood on the road. All occupants died. Not sure about the driver. Chatter was he fell asleep. I could not get an answer whether it was a van with 3-4 kids w mom/dad or not. We pulled into next truck stop I stepped into the little chapel and cried like a baby. Not sure what my point is but I have to step away from restaurant biz. Its too easy to get into a party scene. To me when I was driving I had no desire to do anything but drive. I did have a beer a few times after I shut down but made sure I didnt drive for several hours. If I walk away from the restaurant scene right now I walk away from my wife. Rewind to 2018. I had to cut my best friends 21 yr daughter down from the tree she hung herself in. She lived. She now wanders around talking to people not there every 30 sec yells "I hate you, I hope you die!" I lost a decent Dining Services Directors position within 2 weeks of the accident. I couldn't sleep because I would dream usually pleasant dreams until I opened a door, trunk, etc She would be hanging there saying "why did you save me?" Then poof gone. I started doing speed to stay awake. My wife almost died from alcoholism. I am facing a legal battle. I just want to be free and on the open road or working w those who are. If I do not post again, I want to Thank all of you. This is a top notch site. I love it. Brett, Kerry, Anne, Old School, Davy, and everyone of you good people "Let the good Lord keep you shiny side up, give you safe miles, few traffic jams, pleasant shippers and receivers. God Bless. "Real truckers dont wear flippy flops"! "Give Swift drivers a break. Get out and help!" Suck it up and give your first company a year.

Nothing but Love! Chris K

Hang in there Chris, everything will work out in the end. I had life (in other ways) keep getting in the way from getting started in this career but it all worked out in the end. Often times it may feel like you've hit a brick wall but things will always get better. Care to elaborate or share what type of mistakes you made? We're not here to judge but it may help us lead you to other companies that tend to be more lenient in their hiring. Trucking whether it's OTR or local is hard on families. Unless your spouse and kids understand why you're doing it and are on the same page you're likely to run into problems.

If you're still struggling with things mentally please know its ok to not be ok. There is absolutely nothing wrong with seeking help. I have a close family member that has been seeing a therapist/counselor for about 6 months now and the affect that has had is amazing. Seeking help won't change the past but you'll gain better ways to cope and deal with the issues at hand.

Due to the fact it has gotten very ugly I won't elaborate much. Basically said there's nothing in writing. In the court since it has gotten ugly. I have a Pending drug charge

Where there is a will, there's a way. I have 11 years clean, I've lost a lot of close friends to the disease and lifestyle that accompanies it. I can sympathize.

I can say this though, perhaps it's a filter, maybe I just see what I want to see. But I don't see lot lizards and drugs and booze out here, at the truck stops. I usually keep to myself anyway, but I just don't see the party. Mostly I see people who don't speak English very well, if at all, a lot of flip flops and occasionally some interesting things, (beared black guy in a moo moo and heels at the TA in Alabama). Or the guy I met from Nigeria who asked me for a bottle of water, he was working out, we ended up running the stairs and trails for a while at the rest stop. Our conversation was about being healthy and fit.

Sounds like you have a ton of weight on your shoulders, one minute at a time, one piece at a time, you can get through this to brighter days. Wishing the best for you.

When I drove in. 2005-6 it was bad at truck stops. Happy to hear its changed. I guess blocking the fuel island has taken precedent

Due to the fact it has gotten very ugly I won't elaborate much. Basically said there's nothing in writing. In the court since it has gotten ugly. I have a Pending drug charge

Chris K.,

I sincerely hope & pray things get to looking up for ya, man. I'm always available for support.

Best always,

~ Anne ~

ps: I, like the others, have thoroughly enjoyed this diary/memoir, and continue to enjoy your contributions to TT.

I thank everyone for the kind words. I had a tough nite. Just a lil booze and diabetes. No drugs. I did not want to go back to restaurant work but I needed money and my talent draws a decent check. I am determined to get back into trucking in some aspect. I have a long term goal to drive again, but for now I want to get into dispatch, load planning or brokering. "May you have strong foundation when the winds of change shift". The rest of my otr memoir to restart shortly.