Feeling My Attitude Slip A Bit And Trying To Improve It.

Ive had a lot of little things lately that have kind of compounded and have been trying to keep a good attitude. It has left me contemplating the grass is greener syndrome, and I really dont want to fall into that sand trap.

My DM left to go into the Army, which Im proud of him and really support him, but we had a great working relationship. One of the younger guys covering his board was handling me for a bit. I took hometime in Denver, which is always a struggle to get back out of the area. I had to come up for a funeral of a very close friend, who unfortunately, after a decade clean, relapsed and subsequently overdosed and died.

I had made it clear that I wouldnt be available til Monday. The fill in DM sent me 3 loads (not good loads either) while I was at the funeral service. I was standing there talking with his daughters, to which Im basically an uncle, trying to hold back tears. I just bit my tongue, didnt say anything, and declined them the next day with an explanation that I wasnt available until after the pick up times, let alone delivery on them.

I called him the next day after I was feeling a bit less angry and emotional considering the loss. After seeing me decline the load, he dispatched me on it anyway. I told him I clearly was not available and was not in shape to do the load. He said he would call the customers and let em know Id be late. Anyway, I just said Id get with my regular DM. I ended up doing the loads, he never contacted the customers, I did.

I am in a position to basically have to start over with a new DM and train him as to where, when and how I like to run. I have banked a lot of favors with the other DMs, taken loads that others wouldnt, fixed problems with customers and done my best to make their world better, in exchange they give me flexibility and great loads. Its a win win relationship. There are some areas that I really prefer not to run, I will if Its needed, but its usually a favor for a favor.

Im now also having to politely pursue detention and breakdown, layover pay, which I didnt with my previous DM. He was always very prompt and diligent with it. I let a fair amount of it slide if I dont think its worth the battle, theres also a give and a take.

I spoke at length with Doc about it, he suggested that I take real time off at least a few days at a time where Im not thinking about the truck and my next load when I do take time off. It seemed to resonate a bit. I have just been taking a reset only when needed and unexpected time off for weather, but when I do that, my head is in the truck the whole time. I dont want to end up like one of those guys I see at the terminal sitting around complaining about everything instead of working. Im still putting one foot in front of the other and being really careful of pausing before I say anything, as I dont want my attitude flavoring my comments. When I was young, I was pretty hot headed and Im careful to not be that way now.

Im coming up on a year in a few months, is it normal to kind of get a bit cranky and rough around the edges like that around a year? I really do enjoy working at Knight, and love driving, love the challenges and rewards, but at the same time, I can feel frustration barking at me? Trying to just put it out of my mind and concentrate on performing at optimum levels, because I dont really know of a solution yet.

I agree with the taking real hometime. Even if you do it somewhere else. When I drove for Schneider, I used to do a 34 at a Friend's house in Ohio (I live in Florida). It wasn't considered hometime, but it gave me a chance to get my head, as well as my body, out of the truck.

If you can talk to someone a little higher in the chain of command, and politely tell them your concerns, maybe you'll get a more solid DM and treatment.

It seems to me, many of these companies are very good, but a lot also depends on the people. In fact, just about every job is that way. ABC trucking company might have a great group in Memphis, TN, but a crappy group in Birmingham, AL. Unfortunately, when you hire onto any company, you're really signed on to take whatever work they give you. However, that doesn't mean you have to do all kinds of managing customer relations just because some idiot can't do their job.

The grass IS SOMETIMES greener. The challenge is determining if it's greener because of the extra care involved in maintaining it or is it just because of your angle of sight?

Whatever you decide, it sounds like it'll be an informed decision. Hang in there and ROLL ON!

One thing I learned in caregiving class is that when one has a major event in their life, a marriage, a divorce, a death, etc that person needs to NOT make major decisions for at least one year. During that time emotions go up and down and can be all over the place, which will affect the decision.

Now, everybody is an individual and is the one-year a hard and fast rule? No it's not. It can be as little as six months or it could be upwards of two years. Although much past a year, then the person needs to get into grief counseling if it's a death.

For you Davy A, to think about going to another company, it's far too soon. Also you just had a major change with your DM , so you need to wait a bit and let the new guy get his feet on the ground and going. Now, you can go and talk to the next person up the chain and see if some things can be resolved. However, don't make a drastic change to another company for at least 6 months.

Laura

I went through those same feelings earlier this year. After speaking to a bunch of companies, it turns out the grass isn't much greener, but that's a personal choice for you to make. Nobody can make it for you.

I agree with everything Steve said. Don't be afraid to climb up the ladder until your issues are resolved. Being alone and unhappy isn't good for you and it can be dangerous while driving.

Good luck and keep doing what you're doing. I'd also like to express Condolences on the loss of your friend.

I’m sorry about your friend Davy. The older I get the more funersls I attend. Sad part of life.

I’ve gone through more DM’s than I can remember. Some were promoted and some were terminated. It is a very challenging time, espically after spending so much time and effort to forge a great working relationship. Change can be a pain in the backside.

You did it once and you can do it again. I always meet with the new ones for an expectations discussion. Their’s for me and mine for them. Some have seemed suprised, but I feel it is necessary to set a firm foundation and ensure we are both on the same page. Then we move forward and get to work. If something goes south deal with it at the time. Do not let something slide now and bring it up later.

Fill in DM’s are usually a real pain. They don’t want the extra work and probably have no idea who you are or how you work. I have one right now and he is brand new. I have my week already planned but friday he wanted to mess with things. He had good intentions, but I already had things set for a particular reason. We had a very short conversation and he understood how things were going to go. The most garbage I ever had was over a load they wanted me to do and I had to tell them no 5 seperate times.

The grass is no greener on another side, just a different shade. You will be doing the same things plus more if you go somewhere else. You seem to have a good handle how Knight works, so stay put and go through the new DM blues and get back to work. It is always a roller coaster ride.

I wish you the best!!!

My condolences Davy. I’ve lost friends, some in a similar fashion.

I agree with sticking it out. Realize that retraining a DM is part of our job. In the 8+ years of running WM Dedicated with Swift, numerous DMs and planners came and went. Each time this occurred and as they eased into the job, I’d have a 10 minute face to face meeting so they could get to know me and also I’d get to know them. However I do acknowledge this is easier on a Dedicated account, it’s still up to you to establish the working relationship with a new support person.

I also want to share my experience committing to Swift beyond my rookie year; it’s the second year and beyond when you will see the fruits of your labor pay-off. There are several good TT Blog articles addressing this.

Take some time away from your truck enjoying an activity that will help to recharge your batteries.

Good luck!

Hey man, sorry about your friend. Hang in there. Write a song about it. I’ve heard that heartache is the well spring of great songs. As far as DM’s go, it’s the luck of the draw. If you get somebody who transitioned from driving, that is usually a good thing. Like G said, drivers have to educate their DM because most of them have never driven. My last DM was a girl young enough to be my granddaughter. Whenever I finished speaking with her, which was not that frequently, she would always tell me to “stay safe”. I would tell her to be careful and not dose off and fall off her chair and hit her head on the desk on her way down. It got to be a little private joke between us, but you get the point.

Cruddy news about your buddy, and wishing his daughters well.

The advice here is sage - stick it out. Get to know your DM , and let him get to know you. If you lucked out and got a great DM the first time in, that's a good thing. The new guy will likely need to get some experience as to your work ethic, your drive, and your commitment to moving freight. That's part of the learning process for him. Will he likely get some junk sent your way? Ya, probably. If you are able, do it and do it well, then have a convo with him after the fact letting him know that previously you "had an arrangement with XXX", but you ran the load because it needed to be done, or to help him out, or whatever tone you want to use. You show you're a company driver and ride for the brand, but that you also have some preferences.

Good luck - if you're a worker, he will recognize it and will acknowledge it. Give him a chance.

You can confirm with the reno terminal that i have a **** poor attitude, it is amazing that through the years they treat me like a top tier driver with my wild mood swings, you happen to work in a sweat shop on wheels, nothing will change at another company except the name on your truck, from my experience i cycle through months of uncontrollable anger to mild depression to exceptance that this is truly a terrible job and cant believe people think its a badge of honor to work 7 days a week, 90 hours a week at roughly 35 percent unpaid work, you just gotta keep pushing on and hitting the planet fitness hard af

Also, having spent 2 years at prime inc, you dont know how easy life is at knight, seriously