Son Heading To Melton's Early Tomorrow. Very Anxious!

Hi all,

I started reading on this forum many months ago, when my son first expressed interest into going into this line of work. First off, I want to say that the people here seem very knowledgeable, down-to-earth and much more "real" than the coworkers I have worked with for almost 3 decades. I really hope you can give me honest feedback and advice. I hope nothing I write offends anyone, because I do not mean to offend.

My son, my everything, is leaving tomorrow morning to begin his orientation at Melton's to be an OTR truck driver ( flat bed ). From my research, this is a dangerous job. I am terrified of the dangers he will face. I am scared of the tarping/untarping, I am scared that he may injure himself, make a mistake while driving - like hit a barrier and end up in the ocean, maybe be the victim of violence...I am just so terrified.

He is a very smart boy. I try to keep reassuring myself of this and know it to be true, but right now, I cannot stop shaking. I am so scared. Any information into this world would be greatly appreciated. BTW, he did have multiple health issues, from a newborn until he was about 5-6 yrs old. He has overcome SO much. I need help with living while he tries this.

Please help me.

Hi Mom! I was 41 when I came out here and my mom.was terrified. What i did was show her videos of how our mechanics inspect things. I showed her messages from my company that told me to shut down in bad weather. And i showed her videos of how I get to choose where i park for the night, meaning i park in safe locations. It took a couple years, but she calmed down. And i sent her post cards from all over the country. After awhile she then bragged to people about my travels. She was even jealous of me about the places to which i had been.

My question for you... how good of a mother have you been? Did you do a good job guiding him? You did? Then you habe nothing to worry about. Most jobs are dnagerous. I worked as a manager for a drug store and was robbed at gunpoint twice. I managed an auto body shop and a customer put a gun in my face. 9 years out here and no robberies, no serious accidents, and none of moms nightmares came true.

I have a Youtube channel unde this same name. If you see how many women students I habe that are doing this... how the truck stops can be bright and wide for safety, how the companies exoect us to shut down, you will feel better.

As far as injury... he can fall.and break his leg anywhere. He doesnt need to tarp to get hurt. Let your baby grow up and you may be shocked at how rewarding this could be.

It's hard to follow Kearsey's amazing reply here, but I'll just add that he will learn so much about himself and what he is able to accomplish in short time out here.

I haven't felt in danger out here but we carry a lot of tools and have legal means to protect ourselves if need be. Like she said, we choose where to shut down. Get an uneasy feeling somewhere? Fire up that engine and on to the the next option. My company as I'm sure most do sends the messages Kearsey's does. We decide when it's safe to run. I've never felt pressured to run by my company when I didn't feel it safe to due to weather or maintenance-related issues.

How old is your son? He's in for a wild adventure like no other and I believe anyone who tackles it comes out stronger on the other side. Best of luck to him! I get that you're worried about his new career choice and hope this site can help put you at ease. You came to the right place, and if he comes here too, we'd all love to help him succeed as he deals with the rookie struggles we've all dealt with.

Also i want to point out this idea... i was told being a woman, i would be at risk for.danger. but consider this... wherever I park, i usually have a truck on each side. That means 2 people, usually men, within a few feet. We can "lock our doors" by wrapping seat belts around the handle.. or running a rope through the door handles and the air horn chord. If someone opened the door, the horn would blast waking everyone.

Check out this video for more info

Personal Protection OTR

As a mother, I am.sure you picked up kids from school.. kids who were fighting in the back seat...disttacting you from you surroundings. you rushed to dance class and football practice then grocery shopping. You didnt notice the car following you. You rushed into the house and didnt notice a guy scanning your home to see if the kids got in through unlocked doors... or watched from the street, looking for night lights in the bedroom windows. Night lights that would let him know which rooms were the kids'. If you screamed, how close is your closest neighbor? Would you be heard? If someone wants to follow me, they need to chase me 400 miles. Very unlikely. If someone wants to attack me, there are usually 200 truckers near by. And i have a huge set of lungs.

My point? Every killer is from someone else's "safe home.town". Infamous killer Ed Gein who inspired Psycho was from a farm in Wisconsin. The road isn't any more dangerous than your home town. It is about observations and self awareness.

Thank you both for replying to me! It means so much.

My son is only 23 yrs. old. He has led a sheltered life, and I worry so much about what may happen to him.

Kearsey, I know that I was the very best Mom I knew how to be...maybe too much so. Helicopter parenting is a mild term compared to how he was raised. It has just been him and I. And, I gotta let him do his thing, and not let my anxieties get in his way.

He is excited about seeing the country, being independent, learning new skills, and I am excited for him. But, he was born with a heart defect, somewhat corrected ( still aortic valve leakage ), epilepsy, reactive airway disease - the worse thing when he was little, cerebral palsy, which is not currently evident, unless you know what you're looking for, a diagnosis of Ehlers Danlos NOS, and suspected muscular dystrophy. He is also now 6'1 " tall, 190 lbs and exceeded everything medical professionals ever said he would. I was told he would never walk, talk, and would be a vegetable his whole life. He graduated college with a 3.7. His health and well-being has been my singular focus. Now I have to learn how to let him go, and not hold him back. That is why I am reaching out to you guys.

I wrote a long reply, but don't see it. Currently, this is my life line. Hopefully, I can learn how to navigate this site.

You didnt see it because new members posts are moderated and approved. We get a lot of troublemakers and trolls, so we find it best to do this.

Be sure to have your son join the forum so we can help him.

Has he already gotten his DOT medical card and permit? He may not even pass the medical exam but i am not a doctor and wouldnt know.

He is 6ft and a man. I am.5ft 4 and a woman. He will be fine. He is smart.

He is excited so try not to harp on him. This is a tough job to learn, but very rewarding and a lifelong skill that can make him $$$ having my mom fight me made my life so much harder while in training. We are here for you both

As a parent and grandparent I can understand your concerns. Very normal. Anything can happen anywhere at anytime no matter what we are doing.

It sounds like your son in very smart and reslient. Those attributes will serve him well.

Melton is a top notch flatbed company. They have great equipment and are good at training from all aspects. He is in good hands there.

They will not only teach him the mechanics/regulations on load securement, but also the safest ways to accomplish it. He just has too always remember to take it one step at a time and not rush.

Encourage him to come here as well and we will all do whatever we can to advise/help him. There are several of us flatbedders here and between us probably isn’t much at least one of us hasn’t experienced.

Wishing you both the best through his journey!!

Hello “Mom”. I feel your pain, as do all of us here who are parents and/or grandparents. Worry is what we do because we care. Not much we can do about that except learn to cope with it. My grandson is 20 and has been on his own for 3 years. The best thing I have done for him is to back off to a comfortable distance and let him find his own way. I then became his safety net rather than a parental figure. So far, he has thrived under that arrangement. But I still worry about him every day, as you worry about your son. It’s completely natural and now you just have to trust that you have done your work raising him with good values and qualities.

We have a real good community here of drivers who care about new drivers. As has been pointed out, your son would be greatly aided by becoming active on this forum. With certain cases, the experienced drivers have been known to give out their phone numbers to new drivers so they have someone to call for information and advice whenever they need help. All your son needs to do is ask, but he needs to do that on his own.

Hi, welcome to the form. Trucking in itself isn't dangerous, it is incredibly intolerant of inatententiveness however.

On here we have a regular that is flatbedding well into his 60s, your son will be taught how to operate in safe manner. Yes, mistakes can happen, just as any other trade, bit with the proper training and aptitude, the chances are reduced.

The CP and epilepsy however could prevent him from obtaining a medical card and thus driving. I'm assuming that since he's already going to orientation those have been cleared, if not, it's every unlikely that he would qualify. The logic behind it is that one can't operate an 80000 pound vehicle and be at risk for having seizures and or neurological issues. I know of a few guys that lost their med cards from having panic attacks.

In terms of being a mom, although it's difficult to do, the best thing you can do is let him become his own man. He can't do that if he's at home. My dad always said the hardest thing was letting us boys hurt ourselves. We did it on a regular basis. But it made us extremely tough and able to flourish in adversity.

I can sympathize for you as a mother, I was born with my legs wrapped around each other several times, the doctors said I would most likely not walk past the age of 12. My mother had me put in corrective braces and crutches along with corrective shoes for years. She had to contend with me teaching skiing on a professional level, racing motorcycles both dirt and road racing, racing cars, trucks and just about every dangerous activity that could have resulted in permanent disability. Over the years I've broken more bones and sustained severe injuries than I could count. Through it all, it would have killed my spirit to stay in a sheltered life and she knew that. Sometimes love is letting go.