Is This Normal When Starting With A Mentor?

Hi everyone, Im sorry for the long post,I have had such an uneasy feeling about this and was hoping to get opinions from people more experienced as I am a total rookie. I recently got my CDL and have started on with a mentor. So far there are things that just feel like a red flag and I would like to know if my feelings are valid or if I need to just get over it and tough it out. Just want to preface this with I am still on my first few days with a mentor, so if I am way off the mark please let me know if Im casting judgements too early. I came in with the knowledge that I am the student and my mentor is the master and that I will be a guest on his truck. I respect that completely and have taken the role of whatever they say in this situation is law. Though I too have been a teacher to many pupils at different ages and levels for the last 18 years now and while the subject matter is different, teaching itself is a skill all on its own independent of subject and it is something I have been very successful at. I am not saying in the least I know more than my trainer because I know for a fact I do not, but I am questioning the method.

First there are things that are just fundamental: I am expecting to go over the road and wanted to get firsthand experience knowing what that is like and what to expect. My mentor is local, home daily and only does one or two runs a day that last 1.5 hours for the first and 6 hours for the second. So far we have done both of them a day and have been on duty for 11 hours a day the first day and 10 hours the second, only going as far as a state away, then I get to go home every day and have weekends off. I was hoping to get firsthand experience driving through rough terrain with a mentor guiding me eg. Mountains and inclement weather as well as what it is like to park at a truck stop, the etiquette and experience staying for the night but I worry I will not get any of this before being sent out on my own. I hate the idea of just figuring it out as I go, especially something as potentially dangerous as mountain driving.

Then there are other things that are sticking out as just potential safety hazards. I understand there are things I learned in school that are not as applicable to the real world and because of driver behavior will have to adjust to the real world, but some of it just doesn’t sit right. Here’s what ive experience so far:

-Pre trip: I understand pre trips on the road might not always be as extensive as what we learned to get our CDL, but I figured they would still be done. Day one there wasn’t even a mention of it when hooking and unhooking to different trailers and taking off. Day two, first thing in the morning my mentor asked me if I remembered how to perform a pretrip. I said yes and asked if we were going to. He said very sarcastically “you can if you want to but im going to sit in here and wait for this timer to be done so we can leave.” He doesn’t do pretrips and just uses those 15 mins to scroll on his phone.

-The very first thing he said to me when I got on his truck was “whatever you learned in school, its all wrong and we are going to do the opposite because it doesn’t apply to the real world.” Again, I know there are things we learned in school that don’t work in the real world the way that was stated to us, but any mention of school, what we learned or saying/doing anything that even hints at something we learned at school aggravates this person. Just one example of many was me moving over from the right lane when a vehicle with flashing yellow lights was on the shoulder helping another disabled vehicle. His response to that was “ why’d you move over? Let me guess, it was something they taught you in school” in a very annoyed tone. From then on ,I was told not to move over or slow down unless it was a cop because a cop will pull us over. I didn’t even bring up CDL school or if it was something we learned, I just always thought it was something we had to do even in our regular cars. And I also have not said anything to the effect of " well in school we did it this way..." even once.

- When backing and parking a trailer: I was told not to look back at what the trailer is doing, just focus on him giving me directions. There are times when Im backing that he stands in front of the tractor and instead of wanting me to look at what the trailer behind me is doing or how it is moving and responding to what I do with the steering wheel, Im told I need to focus on him and just doing what he tells me to do. I get that I need a spotter right now, and I trust that, but I worry if I never even look back to see whats going on behind me then Ill never learn how to actually move and park a trailer. It seems hes just teaching me how to listen to him, not how to maneuver trailers into position, when hes telling me, literally, to stop looking at the trailer and just focus on him. Then in the process confuses his own left and right, and gets mad at me for following the direction he gave me and not “knowing what he meant.”

The biggest thing to remember is this phase is one step to you going solo and eventually becoming a successful driver. If you're training with a home daily, get to the yard early and conduct your pre-trip as you see fit. You were right to move over, it creates more of a safe space for a roadway hazard. My first trainer was home daily and had a rushed mindset. He guided my every back. Though I didn't think I was learning a lot about backing from him, I'm grateful for everything he taught me. The ELD, how to interact at customers and fuel islands, etc. Even after my second trainer (regional) who I learned a great deal from, I didn't feel ready to go solo as most members here didn't. I solo'd in winter and was fearful of my first runs through the mountains because I hadn't experienced that in training. But through asking questions here and of my trainers, I did it successfully. You can learn a lot from your trainer, what to do and what not to do. While you're a student on their truck, continue to do what they say. When you solo out, remember the good they taught you and forget the bad, which you'll realize as you gain experience.

Thank you for the advice so far. There is a lot more to add, I just ran out of characters in the original so I am putting the rest in the comment below as part 2

Then there are other things that just make no sense: when we pull into a terminal or yard 3 times now hes gotten mad that I went too far past the place he wanted me to park, or past the trailer we were suppose to pick up, yet never once pointed to the spot or trailer we were aiming for. All Ive gotten has been “Go that way” then a very loud annoyed sigh a short while later and “ I wanted you to park back there.” Im obviously not a mind reader and wouldn’t know that if he doesn’t tell me before I get to the spot or trailer, but it is apparently my mistake when I pass it.

When I make a right turn, Im told I need to look at the mirror to make sure I pass the curb or anything on that side so I know when to start moving back in from the outside, I agree with this 100%, the problem is he leans so far forward to look in the mirror from the passenger side while I turn that he blocks it and all I see is his backside and the back of his head. Then I get an angry “cut in already.” I brought it up to him and told him he is blocking my view and all he said was I just wasn’t looking.

Whenever I am driving, my mentor is on one of his two phones scrolling, texting or talking on them. So far almost 100% of the time. The first time we took off on the road he told me he would be on his phone, but that he’ll still be watching, somehow. I have been driving 100% of the time I have been with this mentor and when I have a question while driving or a situation pops up that I would like advice on I get a nice display of theatrics first: a heavy annoyed sigh, him exaggerating pausing whatever video he is watching, takes his headphones out then a short “what did you say?” It really feels like I am out there driving alone already and that I cant approach him with anything.

Another situation we ran in to was on a road with a 25 mph speed limit. I was already going 28 and he was telling me to go faster. I told him I don’t think I should and pointed out the speed limit sign and told him I was already going over it. He got annoyed that I questioned what he told me to do and said “Really? The speed limit sign is what youre going to tell me when I drive this road every day?”

The last questionable thing I was told, I think I see the merit to it: when youre on a road that merges together like an onramp or when cars are trying to move into your lane, don’t slow down to avoid them, its up to them to avoid you because youre going to wreck the trailer.” I get that as a tractor/trailer its much harder for us to maneuver around vehicles and dodge on a whim, so I can see why he would say that, but I think the reason I was given, might be a little off. I also don’t want to cause an accident or lose my job/license before I even get started.

I can tell he is not very fond of me, getting annoyed when I ask questions, expecting me to know the answer to something he hasn’t shown me yet and I didn’t learn in school. I was told verbatim that I am horrible at backing, which if its true I don’t mind hearing because its something I need to work on, but I have been only following his direction, so if its wrong then that really reflects on what I am told to do. Either way, I don’t need him to like me and that is no issue at all, I am just trying to get past this and move out on my own but I cant tell if this is normal or if my thoughts of this being off are valid. I am willing to just tough it out, and I am not one to cause arguments, but I worry I will not learn what I need before going out on my own, and if the childish reactions continue then there will be a point where I wont be able to just grin and bear it anymore, and I don’t want that to cause awkward abrasion for the month I am with my mentor.

Any advice from the experienced would be greatly appreciated, I need to know if i need to correct my own state of mind during all of this. Thank you all in advance.

Do you know what job you are doing after being with a trainer? You said you expected to be OTR. Typically you should be with an OTR trainer. Do you know why you aren't? Is it just a shortage of trainers?

Do you have a contact person at the terminal? I would go to them and have a discussion about this and request to be trained for the job you'll be doing.

Old School has the main point: If you are planning to go OTR , get OTR experience, not home daily stuff.

If your trainer says to watch his signal not the trailer when you are backing, tell him he will have to continue with you when you get your own OTR job. Otherwise you must learn to back a trailer without his kibitzing.

On any turn, watching the inside (right) mirror is your job, not a passenger's. Answer this question "Who's holding the steering wheel?" That's the person who needs to be watching the mirrors and the trailer at all times.

Contact the dispatch/training office and ask for another trainer, one that is OTR.

(Here's a secret: Trainers often get paid well for having a student on board. Extra pay for training you, and the trainer gets paid all the miles you drive, as well as his own. You get some minimal pay as an employee in training. Some trainers are in it just for the money.)

I'm a CDL instructor. It is my opinion that you should not forget all the stuff you learned once you get your CDL license. It is true there are a few things done on the road differently than in school, but our job is to get you that license, and nothing more. So crank the landing gear handle with two hands, come to a full stop at all stop signs, and stay reasonably around the speed limit until you pass the CDL license tests.

Thank you guys for the sound advice. I will definitely be reaching out to get a mentor that does the job I will be doing once I'm finished with mentorship. I am suppose to be OTR , when I filled out my application, spoke to a recruiter and went through CDL school I told them that's what I wanted and they told me that's what I should expect as well. I'm glad my worries about missing experience are not just overthinking and lack of knowledge. I dont believe there is a shortage of mentors, I think the issue may be the opposite. When I was at the terminal getting my entrance badge, there were trainers waiting and asking the driver leaders if they had a student for them yet. I think they stuck me with just anyone to give my mentor a student. Originally I was going to go to this mega carriers secondary schooling. Before my start date I got a call telling me to get on with my trainer instead and skip the school portion and the person I spoke to was pushing mentoring very hard. Again, thank you all for your responses. I appreciate you guys sharing your experience very much

You said you ar e a teacher. I assume that means degree and certification real teacher. If you are expecting the same from a mentor, forget it. We are "trainers" which is different. Many get classes for a few hours to a week to reaffirm certain policies and expectations. So do not expect the same structure or planning you get from a teacher.no one will live up to your standarss or expectations if you compare the two.

I have been both a CDL Instructor and team trainer. Once someone has a CDL, the team training puts them in the driver's seat while I am sleeping and vice versa. Although I make it a point to be in the passenger seat for hours at a rime during my 10 hr break, many do not. So at my company, this phase of your training you would be mostly alone while gaining driving practice. Be glad you aren't on the truck with this person 24/7. It can be rough.

You need to be communicative. Tell him you appreciate his experience and want to do a good job but need to know his expectations. You know.when you are about to find a trailer cause you are bobtail , so stop and ask him "which one are we getting? Which space do you want?"

The mirror thing, just stop the truck and tell him you cannot see. I have been in his position myself and done this. It is his job to make sure you do not hit anything. Believe it or not, using mirrors is a skill and most students do not use them properly. I have stopped people from hitting cars, concrete barriers, road signs and signals.

The moving over for cars on shoulder... that is the law in some states. Merging.. i have heard trainers tell students not to slow down because people behind them may not be paying attention. A car rear ended a tractor trailer last year cause the 4 wheeler had been drinking AND texting while driving. When the truck slowed to allow a merge from a ramp, the 4 wheeler driver got killed. Guess who got blamed? The CDL driver always gets blamed.

One thing about merging is, yes, you have the right of way.... but it is easier for them to slow or speed up than you. And often when you slow down, they do as well... and even flashing lights to tell them to speed up doesnt help. So the car remains along the side of.your trailer and they run out of room. Just assume all drivers are morons and make the best of it.

No one feels confident going solo. No one understands backing this early in the game. It takes 6 months to click and 2 years for the fear to go away. Anyone who tells you differently is a liar. Get Out And Look. Backing is about angles and in general, men grasp this quicker. Look at it as a puzzle. If he yells, he yells.

I appreciate the different inputs here, thank you all for taking the time to reply. I did start taking a more direct and preemptive approach where i ask what is expected before the situation comes up just to avoid any negative situations during. It worked for the most part, so I will continue with this approach. Though I will talk to a driver leader and voice my concerns about how what I am currently doing is not what I will be doing, going OTR , and I feel Im missing much needed experience. I still have not delivered a single load or dealt with anything related. I have been working as a long distance yard jockey, moving empty trailers to the same state and location and then back again, every day. Its been easy work but I have yet to learn about managing my clocks to be able to keep running, how to drop a load and what the protocol is when I do. I do have a question though, is this something I can just pick up when I go out on my own? I know all receivers will be different, but I do not know the companies protocol on how to verify a delivery. Though I wouldnt be too upset if I got to go home every night while training. Just dont want to miss out on something important.

Every customer is different. you park, check in at a guard shack and ask or find a shipping office and they tell you. Always wear a safety vest or some will turn you away. Fill the reefer before you go in if u r reefer.

As far as your company, yes that is different prime has a slew of steps, and if u miss one there is an automated message that you get. Your dispatcher will explain when u upgrade and get assigned.

Time management is something that takes a year to learn. The HOS are confusing. And even in my team training, the understanding is limited because teams always have hours.

Try this video. I took great care in making it. It will help with HOS

HOS Explained