Girlfriends And Wives Help Me Feel Better

Hi I just wanted to say I don't understand it. I don't get why a man wants to be away from the woman he loves most his life. Why he would want to sleep in a truck instead of sleeping in bed with her. How he can choose a job even though it may cause him to miss events he should be there for, like a sisters wedding. I'm lost when it comes to the job, I don't see how it's nice traveling alone on motorways for long hours. I get the truckers have a special bond to each other and take pride in there trucks but I don't see why you must be a contential driver to earn more respect. I've never driven a truck, I don't even drive a car haha but I respect the men and woman who can do this job. The hours are long and they get little thanks if any at all from others. I trust my partner, I know he'd never hurt me that way. Most people have put a bad name on truckers but I don't believe that's true. I think if someone wants to cheat they'll do it no matter where they are. But I don't get why. Why you'd love someone but it's ok to be away from them. Why you choose to be on the road instead of at home with your family. Why would the person hurt the person by not wanting to be there.

I know everyone's different and I know that it's hard for truckers but it's a lot harder for the person at home. It's hard cause the trucker chooses to be away. The person at home loves the person and try's to support them. Its tough and tougher with children. I think any woman or many at home while the trucker works deserve so much credit. I would love advice on how they do. How they get through it. I also would love advice and opinions from truckers and why they would prefer to be out on the road then working local.

All advice greatly appreciated, I hope I don't offend anyone from what I wrote.

Thanks :)

"Husband gone, wife at home" has been going on since men went to sea in ships. Yeah, but, it's me this time.

(I'm talking in the traditional way here, feel free to swap sexes as needed)

There has always been women who can love a man who is on the road most of the time - manage the house, raise the kids, etc. That's not everybody. My wife doesn't like my being gone. I've found a compromise in a regional account that gets me home every weekend. But I'm absent 5-1/2 days a week.

I call every day. Besides "reporting" my travels, I ask how her day was. We talk about my planned ETA to the house. It's not easy. Sometimes if my route passes through Memphis, I spend the night at my "private truck stop", but I'm off again the next morning.

I have a long term plan to move to a Driver Manager position, but that takes patience itself, waiting for an opening. Both of you need to work out a coping system to keep and satisfy your love.

I've been on both sides of the fence.. stay at home wife and mother to an O/O and now I'm driving OTR myself and dating... another driver with my company. I was always way too busy to worry about it. . Certainly not the jealous or needy type.

Incidentally my other half and I are discussing teaming, however we both feel its extremely important for me to get my solo experience before we do join forces.. but lately it's a near daily topic. We do talk for hours each day lol.. gotta love a Bluetooth headset. He generally runs at night while my truck is mostly solar powered. . Freaking Volvo headlights aren't real good.

Sometimes we get lucky and end up in the same place for our 10s and he takes his hometime every other weekend at my house. Once we actually got to do our resets together up in Cedar Rapids. We both generally stay out about 2 weeks at a time even though our company would get us home (or wherever we request) each weekend.

Yesterday I missed him by about 50 miles lol.. he was wanting to stop so we could see each other but I was on a deadline and simply didn't have the time :-( Can't wait til next weekend. . We can lay around, watch movies and do nothing together. That's my idea of a perfect weekend.

I was engaged to an army infantry soldier who was deployed most of our relationship so going to a trucker I saw every month was easy. He then encouraged me to get my license to team with him. a year later.... well.. he's not arouND anymore.

it depends on what you are having problems with. Are you concerned with loneliness or are you jealous and not trusting him on the road? Are you afraid you will lose the closeness and commincarion?

Best thing to do is live your life and do things you enjoy. It will pass the time e and keep you active and not counting the minutes. Skype and kik...send pics. If you are jealous imagining him picking up women across the country then you need to reassess yourself the relationship aND him. If he cheated at home then he will cheat on the road. If he never cheated.. odds are he won't.

I actually like LDR cause you are lovey dovey missing each other aND when he comes home it's great in every way. By the time you annoy each other... he'd be on the road again hahha.

I gave army guy permission to have sex while he was deployed knowing he could get killed at any time. Told him if he knocked up a woman he better bring the baby to me and leave the ***** there. He laughed and said he loved me and no one else could satisfy him anyway. Lol

Keep talking and laughing. Try not to make him feel guilty for leaving you.

As someone who is leaving a husband at home to go OTR for a month at a time, I can say it's NOT something as simple as "choosing to sleep in the truck" instead of with the one they love. The decision to be a trucker is made for many different reasons. Many times it's not an easy one, but it's still the right one. If there were a way to do everything that the job offers without leaving the comforts of home you'd better believe we would all prefer that. It's a sacrifice we and our families make for this job, for the promise of financial stability, unlimited job potential, immense personal satisfaction, and an unrivaled sense of accomplishment.

Hi, just joined the forum. Need some advice. My boyfriend just passed his cdl and waiting for orientation and start of driving his first miles. He's been out for 6 weeks now, and even though he was told he could take a week off he decided to stay in the paid for hotel as he does not have any income. In between college and now back at the hotel he has not called much and when I call him he leaves the room he's sharing with another student driver. At first I didn't think anything of it and I want to be supportive but it seems he's hiding to talk to me. They have had parties in his hotel room as well as during school they (other student drivers) got together to go out and drink. He himself told me one of the guys who is married with children, said that if he had a chance with a woman he would definitely take it. Although I trust my boyfriend his coed makes me insecure he is living with the type of guy who is always talking about woman and things I can't mention that are inappropriate. The thing that makes me very insecure is the fact that my boyfriend has to leave the room when I call so that I won't hear the noise. I feel as if there are woman in the room as part of the "get together" and he is lying to me. The reason I feel this way is because he says he'll call me back and he doesn't. If I text he won't answer, this has happened every time there is a so called get together for happy hour or hanging out. There are woman in his class however HE is the one that by his actions is making me feel insecure. I feel this new trucking career will destroy our relationship. We've been together for 10 years and have not been married due to his financial burdens and child support issues. He has no way of contributing to providing for our family so he choose to give trucking a shot. For this reason I can understand the sacrifice what I don't understand is why should I always be the supportive one and he does not see that I am also affected by being home alone taking care of everything else. Instead of making me feel at ease and that he is not doing anything he shouldn't, is the total opposite. He makes me feel he's lying and hiding something. To clarify, I am not the needy type, I have a demanding job and kids so not much time for that, however honesty is everything to me. I have given up a lot to be with him and spent many years of my life waiting for him to get things settled. It makes me feel so insecure and sad that after my sacrifice to continue with the relationship, I lost all these years of creating a stable family memories for my kids for nothing.

Sorry for the length of this, just feeling very depressed. He's losing our relationship just for a few months between studying and hanging out at the hotel until he's assigned to drive? It's like he's a little boy with college freedom, I don't even recognize him. this is affecting my daily family life having the household to myself, daily stresses and his attitude is just contributing to affect how I can handle his absence plus having to worry about if I can trust him or not.

When I was OTR my wife used an app that I believe was called find my friends. Throughout the day she would pull it up and see where I was at that time. It may sound silly but it really helped her a lot.

Funny story, I had ran into a rest area one afternoon and as I was walking out my phone beeped for an incoming text. The text read "potty break?". My first thought was how in the #$%@ did she know that lol.

Woody

My wife uses the same app. She tracks my progress and sees where I am at. It makes her feel better to see that I am still moving. If I am moving, than I am ok.

The only advice I can give Carol T., is with any relationship situation that feels like this. Talk to your guy about basically what you've discussed here. He will be the best person to ask and provide insight as to why he is doing what he is. And either he can be more supportive towards your feelings and make improvements to set you at ease, or not. Where you go from there is up to you. 10 years is a long time and any changes will be hard including one partner changing gears to a new career. Esp one of trucking. Your feelings are valid, now while saying that there may not be anything to worry about but express your feelings none the less.

Good luck

Thanks Kemo, really appreciate your feedback. I need to talk to him but not ready yet. Right now it will not go well, never felt like this I usually try to fix differences fast but this time, don't know what is the matter but I feel humiliated and don't want to talk to him any time soon.

Thanks again and be safe out there.