Jerks At Truck Stops

I applaud you for confronting him. I would have done the same thing and I would have been there right with you. Bullies won't stop until people stand up to them. I don't try to change that side of me, I embrace it. Of course, I know how to behave when the situation matters (like at a customer), but at a truck stop they can go screw themselves and I would be happy to tell them that. Going back into your truck and letting them bully you won't make them stop, bullies need to be stood up to. But maybe that's just the young guy in me talking.

Yep Daniel You're Right My Friend!!!!

I have a different take on this than most and it comes from my dad. I agree with Frank wholeheartedly:

Dude, when I read the post the first thing that popped into my mind was: going into the middle of the lane (after finally getting in the hole) and taking a huge, very demonstrative, bow. Thus saluting all the onlookers and acknowledging that I am well above their level by being able to laugh at myself...and that I succeeded without any of there "ass"istance.

That's exactly the kind of thing I would have done...cracking up laughing the entire time too. Here's why....

Now my dad (and all of my elders) were blue collar guys all the way. My dad worked in a steel mill for 18 years. Almost everyone in my extended family was in the auto factories, steel mills, laying bricks, or some other form of tough blue collar labor. Now my dad was the kindest person you'll ever meet in your life. But one thing he always taught us growing up was never let someone know if something bothers you. Otherwise you're in for a world of hurt.

My dad would tease you to tears if he knew something bothered you. He was relentless. But that's just how blue collar guys have always been. They're ruffians! They want to see if you're tough enough to hang with them or if you'll go crying to your mom if someone calls you a name. Athletes are the same way. I grew up in sports and whether you're talking little league, high school, or the NFL (I'm told) you're going to catch holy h*ll if you let the guys in the locker room know something bothers you.

So the solution was always simple....laugh along with em! I mean, hey....if you're brand new at something and you look like an idiot doing it then that's going to be funny to people who are good at it, right? If you jackknife your trailer trying to do a straight-line back, people are gonna crack up laughing! If you spend 20 minutes going in various directions, none of which are getting you any closer to the spot you're trying to back into, that's going to be funny!

But why is it funny? Because the people laughing remember quite well how it feels to be that guy and they're sooooo delighted it's your turn to take the relentless teasing now. They've handed off the "rookie ball" to you and now it's your turn to run with it and you're going to take a beating. That's life. That's how it goes.

No one is more endearing than someone who can laugh at themselves. Why is that? Because if a person is able to understand that sometimes we all look silly and they're willing to tolerate their own flaws then they'll likely tolerate ours too without going berserk. Not only that, but the confidence you display by being secure with your own fatal flaws is also comforting. It's hard to be confident in someone who isn't confident in themselves.

So I say if you've done something to make people laugh then enjoy the fact that you've made their day better. Also enjoy the fact that you have the courage to take on difficult challenges and the character to take the heat for it when you look silly. I was taught you have to "man up" (and that goes for the ladies too) and take a little ribbing when you deserve it. Sometimes they might just strike a nerve and it's incredibly embarrassing. But for the love of God and all that is holy do not let people know that. Just let out a big hearty laugh and enjoy your status as a fatally flawed human being right along with em.

Oh....and one last thing. No one is less endearing than someone who can dish it out but can't take it. If you're that type you're going to catch holy h*ll when people figure that out, and it won't be long. Because as fun as it is to tease someone who can take it, it's 10 times funnier teasing someone who can't, and 1000 times funnier teasing someone who will dish it out but can't take it.

So play your cards wisely. You're going to look like an idiot sometimes. We all do. How you handle it is going to tell people a lot about your character.

Bullies won't stop until people stand up to them

I meant to address that. What makes a bully stop is showing them you're unaffected by anything they say. Now I'm not talking about physical threats. In a schoolyard you may not have that opportunity if they're coming at you with fists in the air. But we're talking about words here only, not physical threats. In that case the very best defense against verbal bullies is to laugh along with them and try to enjoy it. Heck, encourage em with more opportunities! Point out things they forgot to tease you about and laugh along with it!

If teasing you doesn't bother you it takes almost all of the fun out of it. And that's why they're doing it - to laugh at you when you get mad over nothing.

In general, the best way to disarm someone is to remain unaffected by their attempts to manipulate you, or take it a step further and make sure they get the opposite of what they're gunning for. If they want sympathy, give them apathy. If they want to instill fear in you, show them courage. If they're trying to make you mad, laugh along with them. Giving someone the opposite result of what they're going for is often the best way to get them to quit trying. I mean, what's the point of doing something if it's not working, right? Figure out what they're going for and give them the opposite. That's the best way to reduce or eliminate that behavior.

I even use that principle to train my dog or make the other animals easier to work with. For instance, when I first got my dog he would nose around the kitchen looking for food when he could smell it. Well I naturally wouldn't give him anything and instead I'd send him about six feet away and make him sit there quietly watching me. After a few minutes if he sat there quietly I'd give him a treat. It didn't take long for him to figure out that if he wants something from me he should come over and sit a few feet away patiently while I figure out what he's asking for and give it to him. Otherwise he gets nothing. That applies when he's hungry, when he wants to go outside, or even when he wants to play. He doesn't come over and start pushing me around or trying to take things from me. That has never worked once for him. Instead he sits quietly and responds when I say the word he's looking for which is usually "outside" or "hungry".

So what's the sense in doing something if it won't produce the results you're looking for, right? Exactly. So if teasing someone is fun because it makes them angry then make sure you laugh and enjoy it when it's aimed at you. Otherwise it's always going to be aimed at you!

Why oh why can't we all act civilized? You could've just moonshine him, please!

Psh, be nice to them after what they've done? Not a chance. In my country they would hang them by the balls.

(Said in a thick Russian accent)

Once in a (great) while you'll come across the exact opposite. One day I was trying to back into a spot at the Pilot in Minooka, IL. Anybody who's ever been there knows the place is a zoo at all hours, and tighter than...well, let's just say it's tight. I had a good view of the truck on my left, but of course I couldn't see so much as a twinkle of chrome off the truck on the right, and the line trying to get out of the place was backing up the fuel island. The driver in the truck on my blind side got on his CB and, rather than give me a ration of sh*t, verbally guided me in from that side. Probably saved me at least 10 minutes of hopping in and out of the truck, and God only knows how much grief from all the other trucks trying to leave.

So yeah, don't let em get to you. Some guys just get off on being pricks. Those sort of guys are obviously trying to compensate for other shortcomings in their lives, and you're better off in the long run just ignoring them. Acknowledging them just gives them the attention they're looking for and encourages them.

Just take your time. i know for me i still struggle at times but not nearly as bad as i did a month ago. For me something just clicked and everything seems to work. Hell my first ever solo back ended up being a 90 degree blind side as here was no room to turn around and that was the last spot in the lot. I did my setup and got out and looked like every few feet but it went in perfect. Just take your time you will get it. it does not matter how long it takes as long as you do not hit anything.

Seems the obvious solution is to just turn the radio off when you're getting ready to back into a spot in a truck stop. Can't think of any good reason to have it on at that point in time anyway... it's not likely I'm going to take stock in any "help" being offered by anonymous strangers over the radio. As far as idiots recording it all on their phone... I don't think I'd ever even notice that when up to my eyeballs in a difficult backing situation. Focus. I'd follow Brett's advice on how to handle the a-holes... if I even noticed them. I don't like Daniels way though... I recall hearing about a driver being shot in a truck stop after confronting another driver over some petty bull**** like this...

Heck Dude, I couldn't back tonight in a reserved spot I paid for with no other trucks there and someone spotting me! I was just too freakin' tired after a very, very, long day. Now that my friend is some bad backing!!!!