Homesickness

My husband just got out of training and in his first week otr. He not dealing with it well at all. He calls me on the phone in tears and so unhappy. I feel so helpless, and at the same time cold hearted because I keep reminding him why we choose this to begin with. I don't want my husband to be unhappy but I also don't want him regretting quiting before trying to over come these feelings. Am I doing the right thing by reminding him why we choose this for our family. I want to help him not make things worse, I tell him I love him and thank him for doing what he is doing for our us but is it enough or making it worse.

Toughest part of our job (or OTR) is being away from home.

The best thing is to call whenever you feel like quiting and going home. You'll hit a point where it starts getting easier. It'll still be hard but not as bad. I've cried on the phone with my wife for hrs wanting to just go home and be in the same bed, but after awhile it became second nature to be out. I'd call every morning, lunch and before bed just to say hi. Then I'd listen to music or toss a movie on my laptop and listen to it through my truck speakers. Whatever helped pass the time.

You ARE doing the right thing. Encourage him. He needs to hear that you believe in him. You be strong when he can't. I hope you have a friend or relative you can let go to so you don't lose it on the phone with your husband.

This is much like a military separation. Maybe remind him of that, but it's without the same risks.

It's okay to let him know you are counting on him.

Please, please, please continue to encourage him. And if you're a Believer, rest on your faith. It has served me well.

Good luck and I hope this helps.

Well there is a lesson learned Persian. ALWAYS walk an unknown dirt lot before pulling into it. If it feels spongy under your feet, your truck is going to play submarine. The other thing to watch for is the tracks of other vehicles. In this case, if there are none that is the time to be suspicious.

Lol yeah that's the thing, I DID see tracks from other vehicles that looked like they had turned around just like I tried to do! I'm guessing now that they were probably from dually pickups... :(

But yes, believe me, I will never make that mistake again!

Well there is a lesson learned Persian. ALWAYS walk an unknown dirt lot before pulling into it. If it feels spongy under your feet, your truck is going to play submarine. The other thing to watch for is the tracks of other vehicles. In this case, if there are none that is the time to be suspicious.

I will get him to sign up for the site, I've appreciated the amount of info and help I've gotten and I feel y'all are correct in that he will find it helpful as well, even if for no other reason to see that he is not alone in the way he feel. So thank you guys for taken the time to reassurse me that I'm doing OK in how I'm helping him. I got to remind myself that this is new to me as well as him. And like all marriages its a work in process. I'm not always going to have the right words but as long as he knows I care I guess that what matters at the end of the day.

It is hitting me hard too. Never really had a job where I was this independent either. All of it can seem like too much and overwhelm me at times. I've only been out a month and I find that on bad days, the homesickness hits hardest.

I just pray for guidance and strength and lean on my family with phone calls. It's really all you can do. I am sure it will get better.

I think about how lucky I am to be able to get home every 4 to 6 weeks. When I was in my former job in the military, I'll bet I was gone away from home an average minimum of 6 months out of every 12 for 26 years.

I am fortunate in being used to being away from my family for extended periods of time. So I don't think I will be home sick. What I have always done was just call when I can.

I don't get too home sick...and I'm a newly wed lol. Maybe something's wrong with me... I talk to my wife at least once a day and occasionally get home unofficially for a night just passing through. I just get super bored while I'm driving, so I listen to audio books. That's been the most helpful thing for me, and there are tons of audio books at just about every truck stop I've been to so far. Listening to music is just too monotonous after a while and messes with my emotions.

Your doing everything right. Wives usually do. I understand exactly how he feels. I go through it also. After 2 yrs it has got managable not easier. One thing that makes it worse is all the time we have to think about things. We also loose sight of everything going on at home. Keep him in the loop on current events at home even the little non trival stuff.