Does It Ever End?

I will be registering for CDL school on Thursday but classes won't start until September 14. At this point I am not sure how much more I can research. More studying yes. I have read through my states CDL manual and have been taking tests online and going through tests on TT.

My concern is the nerves and fear. Does it ever end. Not only the fear of the test and learning everything but the fear of failure as a whole. My wife and kids rely on me as the provider and the fear of failure doesn't go away no matter how much I resear and no matter how much positive reinforcement I have been getting from other drivers I have talked to. Maybe I am working myself up with the fear and making it worse on myself I don't know. But I can't shake it. One day I am ok and solid in my decision and one day I am like can you really do this but you can't let them down by failing.

I do like driving but like I told my wife, road trips with her and the kids are just ok but in a previous job doing deliver by car or pick up truck I truly loved and looked so forward to. Although the farthest I drove in one sitting was from York PA to Foxwoods resort in CT. I loved it. Nobody in my ear just me on the road and the radio playing. Peaceful.

Am I getting myself overly worked up or is this normal? 20 months of research and countless talks with other drivers every chance I got. All tell me I can do this and go for it you will love it. Now to shake my own personal fear of failure.

Sorry if I sound like some whiny brat.

I will be registering for CDL school on Thursday but classes won't start until September 14. At this point I am not sure how much more I can research. More studying yes. I have read through my states CDL manual and have been taking tests online and going through tests on TT.

My concern is the nerves and fear. Does it ever end. Not only the fear of the test and learning everything but the fear of failure as a whole. My wife and kids rely on me as the provider and the fear of failure doesn't go away no matter how much I resear and no matter how much positive reinforcement I have been getting from other drivers I have talked to. Maybe I am working myself up with the fear and making it worse on myself I don't know. But I can't shake it. One day I am ok and solid in my decision and one day I am like can you really do this but you can't let them down by failing.

I do like driving but like I told my wife, road trips with her and the kids are just ok but in a previous job doing deliver by car or pick up truck I truly loved and looked so forward to. Although the farthest I drove in one sitting was from York PA to Foxwoods resort in CT. I loved it. Nobody in my ear just me on the road and the radio playing. Peaceful.

Am I getting myself overly worked up or is this normal? 20 months of research and countless talks with other drivers every chance I got. All tell me I can do this and go for it you will love it. Now to shake my own personal fear of failure.

Sorry if I sound like some whiny brat.

I think it's perfectly normal. Be prepared for it to be extremely challenging, because it will be. And the fact that your persevering in spite of the fear is a victory in and of itself if you ask me. I went into this expecting it to be super hard and prepared mentally to give it all I had. It's hard but it's fun to. It's actually fun being a student in some ways.

This job isn't for most people so if you decide it's not for you, I wouldn't beat yourself over it. I love driving this big rig. Love it. But man, west Virginia sucks when your fully loaded. I started getting annoyed after climbing and then descending hill after hill after hill after hill etc etc etc. And the fun part is while descending with the jake brake on and in a lower gear, you have curve after curve after curve. Then climb hill after hill after hill etc etc etc. Man I'm tired

When I first started I was a nervous wreck. And now after a year I look back and feel kind of silly for it. So yes being nervous is normal but I wouldn't over do it. You won't be put in a situation you can't handle while you're in school or with a trainer. I'm more worried about the people who aren't nervous, the know it alls

I'll say one more thing to. All The Talking to other people, reading these forums, and speculating kind of helps in a way I guess. But when I commented on your other post and said trucking is a hands on sport, it's because it is. There isn't any getting around not knowing or being able to do much in the beginning. It's all repitition. Just like learning a instrument or becoming proficient at anything really, it's practice practice practice and trucking isnt any different. If you can swallow your pride for a couple months and be a willing student, before you know it you'll be driving a big semi down the interstate and backing at a truck stop. Fear and anxiety lessens as you become more proficient. It just takes time

Thanks guys. I truly feel this will be a good fit for me. Like I said before, spent the last almost 20 years in sales of some sort. Tired of sales goals and being micro managed. Last sales job was told multiple times if I don't reach this budget number you will be fired.

So I sat watching out the window. Realized I am not much of a people person and like being left alone. Will I encounter people certainly will I have days that don't go smooth or as expected of course. No job is perfect.

And yes I am certainly doing this partly for the money. Who doesn't ? But also doing it for I just want to get out and see the world. OTR won't happen right away until kids are out of school but will definitely be considered in the future. I try to talk to wife about fear and anxiety but she doesn't get it and not sure she ever will. Lots of pressure to be the bread winner and keep the roof over our heads. She supports me and my decision but doesn't get why I'm so nervous. Like I told her I fear failure and immediately the conversation turned to " what you don't think I worry about failing". Umm this is about me right now ;)

One day she might get it.

Don't over think it. Millions of people have learned to drive a truck. Take it a day at a time.

With regard to your wife, be the Tyler Durden that goes to Marla's apartment and dances with her while the cops run past, not the Tyler Durden that tells Marla "Tyler's not here" and says, "If I had a tumor, I'd name it Marla."

When I first started I was a nervous wreck. And now after a year I look back and feel kind of silly for it. So yes being nervous is normal but I wouldn't over do it. You won't be put in a situation you can't handle while you're in school or with a trainer. I'm more worried about the people who aren't nervous, the know it alls

I was never nervous, never knew it *all*, but had a very good understanding of it all.

Have yet to be late. Constantly get 2-3 trips lined up in a row. Nearly never sit. I let the facts speak for themself. :)

@OP: Feel free to send me a PM like 4+ other persons have. I cannot speak for any company other than CRST, but! I can walk you through basically every step of the way.

... And if you read this: Hi Christy! Hope your warm shower clears up your nose. I could hardly hear it over the phone. :)

Tyler,
I started with Swift's Academy last December. In preparing for the 4 main hurdles (school test, DMV test, road training, solo) you learn just enough to pass the next exam. So for each one feel the exasperation, handle the pressure.

Every test is Pass/Fail, so it's only a matter of getting a Pass. True, do your absolute level best for your own sake. When you finally get your own truck, you're almost "there".

Finally you are on your own. And that means backing a trailer by yourself, pulling into a shipper and hoping you're following the right signs to the right shipping office, planning your time (on your own) to maximize your HOS clocks.

After a few weeks solo it'll get easier (even the backing). Good luck!

Don't over think it. Millions of people have learned to drive a truck. Take it a day at a time.

With regard to your wife, be the Tyler Durden that goes to Marla's apartment and dances with her while the cops run past, not the Tyler Durden that tells Marla "Tyler's not here" and says, "If I had a tumor, I'd name it Marla."

Very good reference Bud. Trying not to overthink is sometimes is easier said then done