I know that the wives and/or girlfriends of truck drivers will know that I'm about to say (husband/boyfriends as well of lady drivers).
It's a longing on a daily basis to feel those arms around you. To be able to taste the kiss from softly pronounced lips. To gaze into the eyes of the one you love as you say "I love you" and mean it as if it's the last time you'll ever get to say it. Being able to hear the laughter or just to be……nothing more while in the same room with your other half. There's a comfort in knowing that all is ok while being in the same room with the one you love in total silence.
As I talk to Earl on the phone and listening to his voice I go through all of this in my mind - the memories. Even though he's gone for a short while,it feels like forever at times, and I'm so very grateful when I get to go with him on a trip.
I love being able to wake next to him and watch him sleep, or waking to him watching me. I've come to a point that I savor every moment when he's home. It helps me get through the "away" times when he's gone. Our relationship was a gift granted and I won't take it for granted!
In my stories before this one, I've spoken of trust, respect, and communication where truck drivers are concerned, and this has to also be where marriages and relationships are concerned as well.
If I'm not going to be true to myself about how I feel for the person I'm with, and I think or feel that I need to turn to someone else while they're gone, then I need to be true enough within myself not to be dating or married to that person.
Infidelity is a huge factor in divorce among long haul truck drivers because that person isn't there all the time and the one that's at home thinks they need to find comfort elsewhere. Thank God that's not me!!!
Being able to know in my heart that he isn't finding comfort with another while he's gone and being able to have that trust, respect, and communication through the feelings that run through us while were together makes it all worth while in waiting for him to come home. It keeps me true to the person I love, and am in love with.
Having someone in my life that can show emotion, that will laugh with me, not at me; that isn't afraid to cry, who can make me laugh with all his antics - those are the memories formed that keep me true to him. I love that I am able to communicate my feelings and thoughts, and having him truly listen without judging - these are the things that truly drive my heart to love him so much that having an affair isn't even an option.
I've found that over the years, through experience of having affairs in past marriages and relationships, and the fact that I've grown up enough to realize that when I'm with a someone, that I only need to be with just that person. I've discovered it's a lot less stress when I don't have to worry about calling my other half the other person's name ~ LoL!
If you're in a relationship, married or not, while you're behind the wheel long hauling and things aren't going so well where your relationship is concerned - if you're still very much in love and want to rectify what's wrong - let me suggest remembering why you fell in love in the first place (make a gratitude list about your other half) and keep the best memories alive.
For me, being the person at home is just as stressful as Earl being the person driving for a living. The moments together are lovingly everlasting enough to carry us through till he gets home. I'm not saying that Earl and I don't have our "moments" of disagreements (battle of the wills ~ if you will) and we don't live a fairytale love, but we do enjoy and love each other enough to hold on to the best parts of our relationship to get us through. Besides, I'm the one that usually comes out the winner ~ LoL!
I've made it a point to always say "I love you!" no matter what we're going through, disagreements or not, and to let him know that I have been blessed on a daily basis by having him in my life because I have been blessed - no question, no doubt - he is a gift from God! Trust, respect, and communication ~ I can't stress it enough.
God bless and stay safe.
Sincerely, Karen Smith